Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread

Music posts are a bannable offense.
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Cascade Whore
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Fri Dec 16, 2016 10:56 am

So they are playing music at work that is real songs that have techno beats replacing the normal music and different people singing the lyrics, like thriller and we're not gonna take it without Michael Jackson or dee Snider and going "thumpa thumpa thumpa thumpa"
Wank night's cancelled
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MeatGrease
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Sat Dec 17, 2016 10:22 pm

Cascade Whore wrote:I was talking to a woman at work about how a family of white Muslims I know are giving serious thought of moving back to Germany after trumps election and she says "what's a white Muslim?"
Were they Bosnian?
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Cascade Whore
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Sat Dec 17, 2016 10:44 pm

MeatGrease wrote:
Cascade Whore wrote:I was talking to a woman at work about how a family of white Muslims I know are giving serious thought of moving back to Germany after trumps election and she says "what's a white Muslim?"
Were they Bosnian?
Yeah. Please tell me how it fits into your know it all narrative of how the world works.
Wank night's cancelled
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hipster holocaust
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Thu Dec 22, 2016 11:19 am

Bud of mine compiled his stories, some of these are pretty great

https://coworkerstories.tumblr.com/
MeatGrease wrote:I think New Jersey has permanently fucked up my DNA
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Cascade Whore
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Wed Jan 11, 2017 11:37 pm

I talked to someone at work that seemed kind of slow and weird in a vaguely creepy way. Turns out they were from Xenia Ohio.

SPOILERSPOILER_SHOW
Image
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Cascade Whore
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Wed Jan 11, 2017 11:47 pm

hipster holocaust wrote:Bud of mine compiled his stories, some of these are pretty great

https://coworkerstories.tumblr.com/
This is killing me.
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Geeheeb
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Sat Jan 14, 2017 3:42 pm

Cascade Whore wrote:
hipster holocaust wrote:Bud of mine compiled his stories, some of these are pretty great

https://coworkerstories.tumblr.com/
This is killing me.
this shit is so good.
FVBTVS wrote:
Tue Feb 06, 2018 12:04 pm
from enslavement to obliteration is older than abbey road
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riley-o
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Sat Jan 14, 2017 11:18 pm

Just phenomenal. :tup:
NO WUM CAM BEEP MAYYG BUX

HUG TERROR SQUAD FOREVER
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Cascade Whore
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Sat Jan 14, 2017 11:36 pm

The "coin thrower" makes me think of a cross between a back alley dice game and king wily from predator 2/the elder dwarf from Willow casting little bones to divine the spirit world.
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Cascade Whore
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Thu Feb 09, 2017 9:09 pm

I was told today not to waive a payment fee for a blind customer because some memo from the top is saying absolutey no exceptions for waivers even though our own literature states specifically that if a customer is disabled they are NOT to be assessed this fee. Even though she literally can't see her credit card numbers and by the time she can decipher a single digit the automated system has kicked her out. Even though she can't see her computer screen to pay online. And one manger making smart ass comments like "if she can't see how did she use her phone to call us" and "she better just set up auto pay" After arguing with three managers that they are breaking their own policy and are cruel assholes I was essentially told to shut the fuck up.
I really we get sued.
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The Bill
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Fri Feb 10, 2017 10:08 am

Geeheeb wrote:
Sat Jan 14, 2017 3:42 pm
Cascade Whore wrote:
hipster holocaust wrote:Bud of mine compiled his stories, some of these are pretty great

https://coworkerstories.tumblr.com/
This is killing me.
this shit is so good.
I'm not going to lie. I just Googled "Who named Africa Africa?" after reading that.
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hipster holocaust
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Fri Feb 10, 2017 12:18 pm

:lol:
MeatGrease wrote:I think New Jersey has permanently fucked up my DNA
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Wed Mar 21, 2018 11:16 pm

"It's got a real 21 Pilots vibe, like when you go to a poetry slam"
There's the life and there's the consumer event.
featherboa
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Thu Mar 22, 2018 9:39 am

getting all mad at CW's post
let's overturn these tables disconnect these cables
This place don't make sense to me no more
copstache wrote: i cut my hand at work and just let it drip on my desk during a conference call
FVBTVS wrote:probably some punk broth
dames are lousy now mah i gotta bop peckahs
Glub
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Thu Mar 22, 2018 11:21 am

MeatGrease wrote:
Sat Dec 17, 2016 10:22 pm
Cascade Whore wrote:I was talking to a woman at work about how a family of white Muslims I know are giving serious thought of moving back to Germany after trumps election and she says "what's a white Muslim?"
Were they Bosnian?
Were you a stupid fucking fag?
Yes.
Yes you were and yes you are.
MeatGrease wrote:
I became fully redpilled by the summer of 2015 but was already holding back as early as 2014. Before that I was a anarcho punk.

Ideally, society should be organized via a warrior-priest aristocracy.

I can trace my ancestry all the way back to historic germanic tribal chieftains in fact.
featherboa
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Thu Mar 22, 2018 12:15 pm

my desk faces a window into a big bull pen area of a coworking space; now there's some schlub that saunters past ever what feels like 5 minutes.
the other day i went to go pee and he was in the stall with his phone on full blast and he got up and left without pooping after i came in.

and then the spaces' owners sent out memo that said "our ISP says someone here has a virus! please fix your shit" and it was the company said schlub "works" for that had the viruses. and the company is the campaign for a local democrat candidate.
let's overturn these tables disconnect these cables
This place don't make sense to me no more
copstache wrote: i cut my hand at work and just let it drip on my desk during a conference call
FVBTVS wrote:probably some punk broth
dames are lousy now mah i gotta bop peckahs
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Geeheeb
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Fri Mar 23, 2018 4:30 pm

hahahaha sorry man
FVBTVS wrote:
Tue Feb 06, 2018 12:04 pm
from enslavement to obliteration is older than abbey road
featherboa
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Fri Mar 23, 2018 6:53 pm

god all he does is walk around all day
let's overturn these tables disconnect these cables
This place don't make sense to me no more
copstache wrote: i cut my hand at work and just let it drip on my desk during a conference call
FVBTVS wrote:probably some punk broth
dames are lousy now mah i gotta bop peckahs
featherboa
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Thu Mar 29, 2018 1:53 pm

again i went to pee and that guy was in the stall and left without pooping again. he trying to mix a batch in there or something?
let's overturn these tables disconnect these cables
This place don't make sense to me no more
copstache wrote: i cut my hand at work and just let it drip on my desk during a conference call
FVBTVS wrote:probably some punk broth
dames are lousy now mah i gotta bop peckahs
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How Are Mortiis Goatse?!
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Thu Mar 29, 2018 2:16 pm

Maybe he's taking coke
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cxwx
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Sat Apr 14, 2018 4:52 pm

50 year old dipshit spending over $500 on kid rock tickets.
featherboa wrote: I got not-enough sleep last night because Crazy Town went late;
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Sat Apr 14, 2018 8:12 pm

One Time this chick I worked with got fired for saying the N word repeatedly after dropping it while reciting rap lyrics and getting into a discussion with the friend around her about how she feels like she can say it (the complaint to HR was made by a white woman who witnessed the scene in passing, the friend didn't care beyond telling her to shut the fuck up at that moment)
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cxwx
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Tue May 15, 2018 3:37 pm

Woman I’m sitting next to saying she was going to vote for sanders then she became a never hilary-ier then a full time trump supporter. She is older, toothless and can barley walk and said if she gets fired from this job she will have to go in disability even though this is one of the redest states in the union. She sounds like she is prone to conspiracy theories and easily influenced from one random thing to the next. This is more depressing than stupid.
featherboa wrote: I got not-enough sleep last night because Crazy Town went late;
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MeatGrease
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Tue May 15, 2018 10:42 pm

cxwx wrote:
Tue May 15, 2018 3:37 pm
Woman I’m sitting next to saying she was going to vote for sanders then she became a never hilary-ier then a full time trump supporter. She is older, toothless and can barley walk and said if she gets fired from this job she will have to go in disability even though this is one of the redest states in the union. She sounds like she is prone to conspiracy theories and easily influenced from one random thing to the next. This is more depressing than stupid.
Well you ended up at precisely the same life-station, so..she's smarter than you
Jimm O' Lation
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Tue May 15, 2018 11:00 pm

How's the underground punk rock record store job going ?
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