Consumption Be Done About These New Star Wars Movies ?!?!

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spacehamster
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Fri Dec 29, 2017 12:11 pm

Necrometer wrote:
Fri Dec 29, 2017 12:01 pm
speaking of tecbobabble, the "ram via jump to hyperspace" thing made no sense to me, even though that scene was insanely aesthetically satisfying
I'm about 99% sure, though, that it's explained at some point in A New Hope that they have to "plot a course" first to avoid crashing into things. Anyway, Star Wars isn't sci-fi, it's fantasy and full of space magic, so I can live with it getting its physics wrong for the sake of a visual/thematic payoff.

My problem was more, General Laura Dern was going to sacrice herself to provide a distraction while everyone else slips away (because apparently everyone simultaneously jumping ship doesn't register on the radar until someone explains otherwise), why didn't she just turn around and 9/11 that dreadnaught first chance she got anyway? Meanwhile, Rey apparently spends several days on Luke Durden's doorstep just waiting to be let into the house, yet all of this somehow takes six hours.
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Fri Dec 29, 2017 1:39 pm

They probably have like a six hour day cycle on Ach-To ?
NO WUM CAM BEEP MAYYG BUX

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Eight Bit Alien
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Thu Jan 11, 2018 3:58 pm

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canon.docre wrote:I will not be seduced by the cheap showiness of nature.

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Eight Bit Alien
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Thu Jan 11, 2018 4:01 pm

CUNT MOVIE
canon.docre wrote:I will not be seduced by the cheap showiness of nature.

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Eight Bit Alien
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Thu Jan 11, 2018 4:02 pm

I WAS SUPPOSED TO SEE THE SHAPE OF WATER INSTEAD
I WAS SO WRONG
I MADE A MISTAKE
canon.docre wrote:I will not be seduced by the cheap showiness of nature.

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Necrometer
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Thu Jan 11, 2018 4:27 pm

james where have you beeeeeen!

don't you like EDGY storytelling? :lol:
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spacehamster
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Fri Jan 12, 2018 2:07 am

I watched a few Youtube videos because I was curious what the grievances were and now Youtube thinks I want to see every basement dwelling anti-SJW crusader's rant about why there's too many niggers and chinks in the new Star Wars movies. Based on this alone, I've now decided that I'm pro Last Jedi because I want nothing to do with these rambling nincompoops.

I also really love how everyone's so mad that Luke isn't the Luke they've headcanon'd for the last 20 years that they don't notice the actual weaknesses of the movie in terms of its plot structure or just the simple fact that it's too damn long. I mean, I get that it's hard to pull your head out of your own ass if your neckbeard's causing too much friction, but it's just all a bit telling. Fuck "geek culture".
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Fri Jan 12, 2018 7:37 am

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Fri Jan 12, 2018 10:21 am

riley-o wrote:
Fri Dec 29, 2017 1:39 pm
They probably have like a six hour day cycle on Ach-To ?
Gesundheit!
Eight Bit Alien wrote:
Thu Jan 11, 2018 3:58 pm
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First of all, young man... HAHAHA

Second, I'm positive the "not attractive" Asian lady in question is the actual main source for much backlash (Luke stuff is subsidiary complaining). The second I saw that she would be on screen for over 5 minutes I knew the Super Fan Club males would have a shit. Her kissing Fin probably pissed off a mass contingent of the female members of the club as well.

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THE KILL
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Mon Jan 22, 2018 2:12 pm

Finally a cinema in the closest big-ish town decided to show it in English. Was surprisingly dumb, long, and action-filled.

pros:
o good dogfights (the one at the beginning, the Millenium Falcon flying through the red crystal cave) although in retrospect most of it seemed like a rehash of scenes from the old movies (dur)
o some interesting visual touches (the salt desert, Laura Dern hyperramming the bad guys' big ship)
o liked the end twist with Luke not really being there despite the fact they made up a new Jedi power/ deus ex machina
o the score! I never tire of hearing the Star Wars themes. Was happy to see John Williams wrote the score for this.
o Benicio Del Toro
o some cool creature designs; at least some puppets
o Yoda's scene (it looked like they used a puppet? he looked great)

con
o shitty dialogue
o plot holes and dumb decisions everywhere
o the bad guys. If they had just called them Nazis in Space and have them speak like ze stereotypical Krauts I would at least have enjoyed it somewhat. The fascist/ Nazi aesthetic was cool and fresh in the old movies, in the new films it doesn't even come across as campy or corny, just as tired and clichéed
o shitty casting, particularly for the bad guys. shitty delivery of bad guy dialogue
o like in the last one (but not as bad), many scenes were almost lifted from the old trilogy (Episodes 5 and 6)

Decided I was glad to have seen it just on the basis of "they don't make Scifi pulp nowadays, so we should be happy about anything halfway decent we get".

Now imagine someone talented making a Fear Agent movie...
Eight Bit Alien wrote:
Thu Jan 11, 2018 3:58 pm
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LOL
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Fri Jan 26, 2018 11:15 pm

yeah yoda was a puppet and it was great :tup:

this idiot freaking out because the redlettermedia guys mocked him for being a shill:
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MANTIS
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Sat Jan 27, 2018 7:28 am

I really liked the movie and think it's pretty funny how people are overanalyzing the plot-holes, logical leaps, bad physics and cheesy dialogue. None of the star wars movies ever stood up to that kind of scrutiny. They're space adventure fantasy movies for children with laser swords and singing/dancing muppets. They always had bad dialogue and huge plot holes, and they've always completely disregarded physics where it suited them. You just didn't care cuz you were seven years old.

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Sat Jan 27, 2018 8:38 am

people didn't actually dislike the movie because of that shit, it's just where your mind goes when you're not enjoying something. new movie mostly sucked; too much goofing around and basically no character arcs. kylo is the only part that's working.

it's so funny that his name is "ben". do you think if luke had a son he'd name him "yoda"?
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MANTIS
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Sat Jan 27, 2018 9:24 am

Necrometer wrote:
Sat Jan 27, 2018 8:38 am
people didn't actually dislike the movie because of that shit, it's just where your mind goes when you're not enjoying something. new movie mostly sucked; too much goofing around and basically no character arcs. kylo is the only part that's working.
Well that's true that you're more likely to notice things like that if you're not enjoying a movie. I personally didn't think there was any more goofing around than in previous star wars flicks and I wouldn't necessarily agree that there are no character arcs. Adam Driver is definitely the stand out though

I think a lot of people disliked the movie because it was a little too long and oddly structured. There were a lot of new characters that didn't really get proper time to be developed. Fair enough.

Also they didn't like that Luke was a bitter old man now and that Rian Johnson basically threw out all of JJ Abram's lame mystery box setups. Which I thought was great.

Obviously, mileage may vary.

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Sat Jan 27, 2018 9:32 am

Saw it last night. Not that good, not that bad.
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Sat Jan 27, 2018 1:16 pm

Necrometer wrote:
Fri Jan 26, 2018 11:15 pm
yeah yoda was a puppet and it was great :tup:

this idiot freaking out because the redlettermedia guys mocked him for being a shill:
a few years back i attempted to make a go at writing movie/comic reviews "professionally" for assorted blogs and geek sites.

clips like that make me really glad it never panned out, cause i'd either be on the receiving end of a spite-blubbering boytard, or i'd become a spite-blubbering boytard.

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MANTIS
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Sat Jan 27, 2018 1:28 pm

That guy :lol: holy shit!

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THE KILL
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Sat Jan 27, 2018 5:18 pm

MANTIS wrote:
Sat Jan 27, 2018 7:28 am
They're space adventure fantasy movies for children with laser swords and singing/dancing muppets. They always had bad dialogue and huge plot holes, and they've always completely disregarded physics where it suited them. You just didn't care cuz you were seven years old.
You don't really mean any of that...
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Eight Bit Alien
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Sat Jan 27, 2018 5:25 pm

THIS MOVIE FUCKING SUCKED
canon.docre wrote:I will not be seduced by the cheap showiness of nature.

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Necrometer
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Tue Feb 06, 2018 4:17 pm

those dudes are total morons based on the post-show "insight" they provide in those GoT featurettes

AFAIK everything they've been written has been mediocre or garbage

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FVBTVS
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Tue Feb 06, 2018 4:44 pm

the guy they cast for solo isnt really even very harrison ford!



what about this fucking dude

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Necrometer
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Tue Feb 06, 2018 6:19 pm

ingruber whataboutism forever :tup:

I think solo will be the first sw movie I don't watch in the theater

I hope I'm strong enough
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MANTIS
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Wed Feb 07, 2018 9:23 am

Necrometer wrote:
Tue Feb 06, 2018 6:19 pm
ingruber whataboutism forever :tup:

I think solo will be the first sw movie I don't watch in the theater

I hope I'm strong enough

I'll never understand why they didn't use Ingruber. Ridiculous. I'll watch Solo but the trailer doesn't do much for me. As for the GoT boys doing their own trilogy, sure I'll give it a chance. If it sucks, that's fine. Disney/Lucasfilm are going to quickly reach oversaturation (if they haven't already) with all this 'SW movie every year for the rest of time' business but only about half of the Star Wars that exists was ever any good to me anyway. The original trilogy, Force Awakens, Last Jedi, Rogue One & Genndy Tartakovsky's Clone Wars I like just fine, but then there's the Holiday Special, the two Ewok movies, the prequels, & the CG Clone Wars.

The prequels taught me pretty well to just ignore bad Star Wars. At least half of Star Wars sucks. I'm sure there's more suckiness to come sooner or later.
THE KILL wrote:
Sat Jan 27, 2018 5:18 pm
You don't really mean any of that...
Every word THE KILL.

Every. Word.

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THE KILL
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Thu Feb 08, 2018 8:49 am

MANTIS wrote:
Wed Feb 07, 2018 9:23 am
THE KILL wrote:
Sat Jan 27, 2018 5:18 pm
You don't really mean any of that...
Every word THE KILL.

Every. Word.
Pffffff... you're a bampot, mate...
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