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December 1988

Me and stacie went to the winter ball at huntington jr. High school. We hung out. Danced a little. I had a mullet.

Afterwards we went to bruno's pizza and got a taco pizza. Went to my house. Made out. Ate pizza. I first tasted her asshole that night. She laid on her stomach and i stuck my head up her dress. We watched MTV afterwards. After she left i snuck a few nips off the rum bottle my mom had stashed under the kitchen sink.

Junior fucking high.

I probably stayed home and listened to metallica.

in 1988 I was in elementary school though so it was probably my mom's steely dan tapes at that time.

Geeheeb wrote: ↑Sun Sep 23, 2018 8:56 am in 1988 I was in elementary school though so it was probably my mom's steely dan tapes at that time.

I was eleven in 1988 so I was probably jerking off to Jessica Rabbit.

December 1991

Me and christine went to winter ball. I didnt have a mullet anymore. I didnt snap her hymen until next month. We got dairy queen or something afterwards. Went back to my house and i proceeded to chomp on her well trimmed sniz.

I remember someone got the dj to play something by the butthole surfers and all the jocks started 'moshing'

Another stupid time in the wayback machine.

Started spring training...

In 1988 I was 5 so instead of porno playing Super Mario until I got blisters and seizures.

Spring 1992

Prom. Christine and i went to the prom. I wore a sky blue Miami vice suit. She dressed up like a flapper. We ate dinner with a bunch of other people at a place called waldo's. I dont remember what we ate. Her mom let us drive the ford taurus.
Dance was a typical load of early 90s bell biv devoe meets pearl jam jack offery. The dj played smells like teen spirit and all the jocks bounced around like a bunch of dickheads. I remember sucking down 2 beers before we left cuz dave schmidt had some stashed. We left to go watch movies at my place. She didnt want to fuck on prom night because she thought that was corny. I pounded on her fuckhole the next morning though.

This really was the start of a weird year of crazy bitches and oddball scenarios.

kevin hash wrote: ↑Tue Sep 25, 2018 1:21 pm She didnt want to fuck on prom night because she thought that was corny

Did you try to?

hipster holocaust wrote: ↑Tue Sep 25, 2018 1:53 pm

kevin hash wrote: ↑Tue Sep 25, 2018 1:21 pm She didnt want to fuck on prom night because she thought that was corny

Did you try to?

Dude she was dressed up like a flapper....goddamn right i tried. Prom night had fuck all to do with it.

hipster holocaust wrote: ↑Tue Sep 25, 2018 11:05 am In 1988 I was 5 so instead of porno playing Super Mario until I got blisters and seizures.

I have a scar on my finger from going into an apoplectic rage as a kid during a video game and smashing a glass jar into the wooden handle of a chair. Had fat hanging out of my finger pad, needed 5 stitches.

1997, worst year of my life.

cxwx wrote: ↑Tue Sep 25, 2018 3:31 pm 1997, worst year of my life.

1997 was a crazy fucking year for me.

No school dances but plenty of weed, beer, driving while fucked up and falling asleep with dick in cunt type excursions.

2001.

Met this chick online via yahoo dating. Her name was kara. We arranged to meet at the horse brass to have a couple of beers. Bung had a show that night at conan's (now known as the hawthorne theater). I figured i could wow her with my rock n roll prowess. We proceed to have a pint each. Of course i have 2 pints of fred like a dum dum. Then this chick comes around with little tester shots of different ales and such.

She ends up following me to the venue where i proceed to ply myself with 3 or 4 PBRs. I start getting foggy right about here....

Next thing i realize is that im on stage flat on my back jap screaming into the mic. Apparently i did most of the set from this position. I have no idea what this broad thinks of my antics.

Some little gutter punk chick spits on me and i immediately pick a fight with her and her boyfriend. Im fucking hammered at this point. I follow them out of the venue and proceed to verbally abuse them as they run across the street.

Next thing i know im in her car driving up by ohsu. She has howard jones cranked. Im not even sure of my identity anymore.

Somehow i end up in my truck and now im following her over to the farmhouse on 82nd. She proceeds to sing karaoke to 'i touch myself' by the divinyls. At this point i have no rational understanding as to why any of this is happening. She seems to detect my desire to leave so she invites me to her apartment in....oregon city.

Flash forward im in my truck following this drunk slob to her place. Some highway. Couldnt tell you which one. She decides now is a good time to drive up against the guardrail....sparks flying. I figure shes probably gonna wreck. I wouldnt have cared at this point.

We end up at her place we get stoned and end up in bed with her. The sex was unremarkable. We pass out.

Next morning i wake up and we shower together. We hung out for part of the day. I bought some chuck taylors and some cigs. Then i dropped her off back in oregon city and proceeded to put the whole ordeal behind me.

It wouldn't be the last time i would see this chick.

Ugh.

2007

Show at Satyricon trying to court a lady at the bar next door
A hammered Jesus H Dump says the n word
Lady may or may not have heard it, but leaves
I go home alone and beat it

The end

hipster holocaust wrote: ↑Wed Sep 26, 2018 7:26 am 2007

Show at Satyricon trying to court a lady at the bar next door
A hammered Jesus H Dump says the n word
Lady may or may not have heard it, but leaves
I go home alone and beat it

The end

1992.

Me and christine went out driving around one night. We ended up parking on holcomb acres road right by a logging road. She wanted me to go up her dumper. We go to the back seat of my 75 plymouth and i proceed to whip my bone out. Of course the accomodations were less than ideal i eventually lost my hard on because i hit my head on the ceiling. She laughed. I got pissed and i dropped her off at her parent's house. I never did get to pummel her asshole.

2002.

I was sitting in my apartment on 1959 larch st. It was evening time. My roommate was off with his girlfriend. Knock at the door. I answer it and it was kara from oregon city just showing up at random. I have no idea how she got my address. Im caught off guard as she gives me a hug. We get stoned and the she asks me to show her where my bathroom is. She then tells me to go in there with her. She sits down and takes a monster piss. I was either too stoned to get her going on a second batch of snooze fuck or i didnt want to smoke her out anymore. I lie to get her to leave but not without telling her im going to be playing a show at reid college next weekend.

She left. Cum did not leave my dick. I was too ripped to jerk off.

1998.

Went out drinking at the maltese with a bunch of friends. We would alternate between there and a sports bar named trophies and another bar called peter's where pam worked. She was a waitress a peters and was off at like midnight or something.

I lived at a friend's house which was kind of like a punk house. He ended up dating this chick and living at her house so i ended up sleeping in his room.

So me and pam get back to the place. Toke some weed and get down to business. Clothes come off. We end up going upstairs and eventually my cock sinks into her asshole with pure luxurious ease. After pounding her rectum for about 10 minutes or so and basting her coal chute with some fuck butter. I pull out.

The moonlight shining through the windo onto my MISSING cock. At first i was tripping out....then my eyes adjusted. My cock was covered from top to bottom in her dinner leavings.

She said.....sorry.

I wiped my cock off on my night of the living dead shirt and lit up a cig.

We dated for a few more months. She was hot. Never pounded on her poop cauldron again though. No particular reason really.

No regrets.

The only thing I can remember remotely good or interesting about 1998 was that it was the year Nasum's Inhale/Exhale was released.

Saw/felt real boobs for the first time.

Me and jesus h. Dump used to listen to nasum while pounding down beers.

98 was the year we saw morbid angel, incantation, nile and thy infernal at satyricon. Still one of the best shows.

That actually may have been the night this hot chick squatted down in front of shanghai tunnel and pissed on the sidewalk. Then i bent down and licked it up.

1999.

After pam dumped me i hooked up with kim. Back in the day she was the little punk goth hottie. By 98 she was not as petite as she once was. We hooked up and once she displayed her fat jugs my penis was in worship mode.

One day she came home from the grocery store and she pulled out this cucumber and said that it was for later.

That night at around fuck o'clock we pissed all over each other because we both got really into that. Then she pulled out that cucumber AND a dildo. I then was prompted to put the cuke in her ass and the dildo in her poon. I did some piston styled boom boom on both holes.

I told bob about it the next day at work.