Generic Business Oriented Website

a post on these cretins' backstories would be more filmable than any of rob zombie's scripts (don't want to set the bar too high here...)

Fucking goldmine

bro bro

fuck it.i'll take a whack at one of them.

Richard Manning

Huge spiritual connection with Disturbed's debut record. Hurts toddlers and threatens them if they think about ratting him out.Smokes Chesterfields and did all of his own tattoos. Was molested by a few different uncles.likes to slide a finger in his shit pipe and then smell it.first crime was pranking the cops by having a hundred pizzas sent to the precinct. Spent his 13th birthday locked in the basement.

Alright....let me take a look at these mopes and see what's up....

Big Jess: smokes camel straights, uses his piss to wash his hair tells people 'fuck you....look how shiny my hair is.' Tells people lee greenwood is his uncle. Has no matching pairs of socks. Got his first blowjob from his 19 year old cousin sheila back when he was 11. Keeps tin foil on all the windows of his house. Has watched 'the electric horseman' at least 800 times. Never turns down brisket. Has a donut on the driver's side rear tire of his camaro. Doesn't hold in farts ever.

Richard Manning: uses meth daily. Has a bowflex in his garage. Masturbates on his porch at night. Favorite bands are five finger death punch and hellyeah. Hasn't filed taxes in 4 years. Has started digging a tunnel under his house so that he can ride out the apocalypse. Only eats cheese sandwiches. Drinks a 12 pack of mtn dew daily. Believes that doctors "shove microchips up your dick" so that the government can track you and who you fuck. Believes he was born without blood.

Dot: Steals jewelry whenever she sees some she likes. Tells people she doesn't do drugs but that 'i might have a bit of a problem with drinking cum.' favorite place to fuck is in the bathroom stall in the men's room at winco. Has a swastika tattoed on her ass. Has a fluffy bush. Keeps a vibrator in the glove box of her yellow dodge neon. Smokes a pack of newports a day. Owns 3 pairs of panties. Had a profile on caged ladies dot com when she was doing time. Doesn't know who her dad is. Diagnosed with PTSD and bi-polar disorder. Takes prazosin and seroquel and still has dreams about getting railed out with a broomstick by wayne static.

you're the master

and not too shabby work from jimmo

kevin hash wrote: ↑Sat Aug 24, 2019 12:25 am Richard Manning: Masturbates on his porch at night.

FUCK

Jack Basden: drives a black 95 dodge ram pick up. Plays video poker every day. Has a handicapped girlfriend whom he lives with. Has been living with a toothache for 12 years. Would have voted trump if he had his voting rights. Has a 22 year old son he nicknamed 'fuckhead' and an 18 year old daughter he nicknamed 'the clam.' used to be involved in a local militia but left when he found out he couldn't be in charge. Stopped working when his old lady started getting her SSI checks. Talks about what a bad ass he was back in high school. Thinks toilet paper is for queers.

Necrometer wrote: ↑Thu Aug 22, 2019 9:44 pm

Needs to be quoted again. Man they must have saved each row’s best for last on purpose

I know you still have a lot on your plate, but...

it's not ideal to include the headline but it would lose a lot without it. I'm dying for the original motley crue to be fully biographied so I can say what ties them all together. (it's not meth...)

Korey Hooper: smokes newports. Loves black dudes but she only meets them at their place after dark so she doesn't get stick from her white friends. She drives a dodge voyage mini van that has been keyed horribly. Wants fake tits. Last job was in 2007 at claire's boutique. Her apartment smells like cotton candy and cunt farts. Has a couch with cig burns in it. Big fan of dream catchers. Goals for 2020 'i wanna ride mick thompson's cock backstage and ....uh...i dont know.'

I feel like an asshole for not replying to that last one. I guess I always hope you're about to post another and I don't want to detract from the proceedings?

I guess I'll just leave this here...


can we start a patreon for this guy? seems like a decent way to moonlight.

fuck

Necrometer wrote: ↑Wed Oct 09, 2019 1:48 pm

can we start a patreon

shane smith is a billionaire now

Necrometer wrote: ↑Wed Oct 09, 2019 1:48 pm

mitch and a couple relatives on a drunk?

fucking yoda

Bungy I know you don't have facebook, but encourage you to drop everything

https://www.facebook.com/pg/svmmonnyc/p ... e_internal

Pissbook.