Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
- hipster holocaust
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
Septic tank's backed up at work. The basement smells like absolute death and I hear the plumber and his assistant rummaging around in the filth:
*plop plop plop*...check this out...woo! they got some serious fuckin' nut eaters here...*SPLASH* WOO GOD...
It sounded 2 or 3 times better with a thick CT accent
*plop plop plop*...check this out...woo! they got some serious fuckin' nut eaters here...*SPLASH* WOO GOD...
It sounded 2 or 3 times better with a thick CT accent
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- Wandering Johnny!
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
"My theory is...some people live on the edge...uh...some people really like to help people, even if maybe they don't need help...uh there's always many theories as to what it could be..."Geeheeb wrote:Not work but school:
http://kitchel.net/pics/audio25.mp3
this is part of an audio lecture, skip to 3:04 in...
NO RESOLUTION TO THE MYSTERY, AND SHE FUCKING ANSWERS A TEXT MESSAGE AND DIDN'T EDIT THAT OUT. (This is from an mp3 extracted from a powerpoint for an online pharmacology class).
What does this even mean?
hipster holocaust wrote: What do you think they're doing up there right now? A smiling SLH listening to MLK's juicy wife cheating stories while Maya takes notes?
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- Elitist Prick
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
U.S. Americans and THE IRAQ is what it means.
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
This isn't so much a "dumb thing I heard at work" as it a "holy fuck that's fucking insane " thing
Girl at work calls me earlier today to see if I can cover her shift early for her but doesn't give me a reason why. I assume one of her kids is sick or something. I could not have been further from the truth. She was called in by NCIS and SDPD regarding her knowledge of a suspect in a murder investigation because the suspect is her former neighbor of 7 years. Here's the news story regarding the investigation.
Marine questioned about missing North County woman
FALLBROOK, Calif. -- A search intensified Monday for a 22-year-old North County woman who disappeared over the weekend under suspicious circumstances after getting together with an active-duty serviceman, who was later jailed on an unrelated weapon charge.
The last known sighting of Brittany Killgore of Fallbrook was about 5 p.m. Friday, according to sheriff's officials.
Investigators believe that Killgore, whose estranged husband is deployed on combat duty overseas, was with 45-year-old Louis Ray Perez, a Marine based at Camp Pendleton, just before she went missing, Lt. Larry Nesbit said.
"Based on our investigation to this point, we believe there is a strong likelihood Brittany is the victim of foul play,'' Nesbit said. "Today we are deploying sheriff's search-and-rescue units to assist in locating Brittany.''
The effort to locate the woman was centered on the area of De Luz Canyon, north of Fallbrook, the lieutenant told reporters.
On Sunday, detectives arrested Perez on suspicion of possessing a stolen AR-15 assault rifle. Perez, who was being held at San Diego Central Jail on $500,000 bail, had been uncooperative with investigators handling the missing- person case, Nesbit said.
At the time of her disappearance, Killgore was wearing a dark-purple evening gown with shiny floral patterns on it. The brown-eyed brunette, who is 5 feet 7 inches tall and weighs about 130 pounds, may have traveled to the Gaslamp area of downtown San Diego that night, officials said.
Nesbit declined to discuss the suspicious circumstances surrounding Killgore's absence and would not comment on the nature of her relationship with Perez.
The woman filed for divorce last week, according to court records. Her Camp Pendleton-stationed husband, Cory, reportedly is serving a tour of duty in Afghanistan.
Anyone with information on her whereabouts was urged to call the Sheriff's Homicide Detail at 858-974-2321.
Girl at work calls me earlier today to see if I can cover her shift early for her but doesn't give me a reason why. I assume one of her kids is sick or something. I could not have been further from the truth. She was called in by NCIS and SDPD regarding her knowledge of a suspect in a murder investigation because the suspect is her former neighbor of 7 years. Here's the news story regarding the investigation.
Marine questioned about missing North County woman
FALLBROOK, Calif. -- A search intensified Monday for a 22-year-old North County woman who disappeared over the weekend under suspicious circumstances after getting together with an active-duty serviceman, who was later jailed on an unrelated weapon charge.
The last known sighting of Brittany Killgore of Fallbrook was about 5 p.m. Friday, according to sheriff's officials.
Investigators believe that Killgore, whose estranged husband is deployed on combat duty overseas, was with 45-year-old Louis Ray Perez, a Marine based at Camp Pendleton, just before she went missing, Lt. Larry Nesbit said.
"Based on our investigation to this point, we believe there is a strong likelihood Brittany is the victim of foul play,'' Nesbit said. "Today we are deploying sheriff's search-and-rescue units to assist in locating Brittany.''
The effort to locate the woman was centered on the area of De Luz Canyon, north of Fallbrook, the lieutenant told reporters.
On Sunday, detectives arrested Perez on suspicion of possessing a stolen AR-15 assault rifle. Perez, who was being held at San Diego Central Jail on $500,000 bail, had been uncooperative with investigators handling the missing- person case, Nesbit said.
At the time of her disappearance, Killgore was wearing a dark-purple evening gown with shiny floral patterns on it. The brown-eyed brunette, who is 5 feet 7 inches tall and weighs about 130 pounds, may have traveled to the Gaslamp area of downtown San Diego that night, officials said.
Nesbit declined to discuss the suspicious circumstances surrounding Killgore's absence and would not comment on the nature of her relationship with Perez.
The woman filed for divorce last week, according to court records. Her Camp Pendleton-stationed husband, Cory, reportedly is serving a tour of duty in Afghanistan.
Anyone with information on her whereabouts was urged to call the Sheriff's Homicide Detail at 858-974-2321.
- Deadhouse
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
Did you ever find out what the actual turnout was? I am sure the dude would have all kinds of rationalizations as to why they didn't bring in 700+.Pisscubes wrote:A medical student started a cover band. He wants to play next week. He told me he'll need a hall that holds "at least 700 people" for the "gig". He knows the his bandmates and him can move at least 100 tickets just to their family and friends and of course the entire medical school will be there, and then there will probably be a "buzz" thanks to his facebook postings so 700 is pretty conservative. He really doesn't want anyone to be left out in the cold, he doesn't want to "fail because of too much success, you know?"
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
This guy thinks his OJT will somehow magically convert into a Bachelor's degree. In reality, the training can in some cases be used towards an electives credit or two. He does not understand. He goes on to say well hell he's got so much training that there's enough left over to give to his wife so she can also have a Bachelor's degree.
copstache wrote: fisshhshticksss
- Black Jacques
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
There are a couple law firms on the floors above my office so I'm in the elevator every day with these fucking cunty lawyers.
"Well there's this place in Austin that will put one of those custom carbon-fibre bodies on it so I might ship it down there"
"Oh? how much does that cost?"
"Eh, about $70K includinhg transport"
"Pfff.. cheaper than a new car"
"Well there's this place in Austin that will put one of those custom carbon-fibre bodies on it so I might ship it down there"
"Oh? how much does that cost?"
"Eh, about $70K includinhg transport"
"Pfff.. cheaper than a new car"
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
That's not so offensive. It's like saying Benelux instead of Belgium, Netherlands and Luxemburg when referring to a common area.Pisscubes wrote:"In Europe and other countries..."
Then again, I don't know this person.
ghost boner wrote:our cousins should fuck
- ibn Horowitz
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
"Well, humans can't pilot the alien ships, and besides we have a galactic reputation for violence, so the aliens have created hybrid beings that will be able to teach the rest of us to fly the saucers. They call them Star Children."
On a vision he had at church:
"It was a huge fireball, which I think means there will be a super-volcano eruption. It's the only thing that could affect the whole earth. The next part of the vision was a burnt tree, symbolizing climate change."
"You don't believe in 2012?! You gotta do some more reading."
On a vision he had at church:
"It was a huge fireball, which I think means there will be a super-volcano eruption. It's the only thing that could affect the whole earth. The next part of the vision was a burnt tree, symbolizing climate change."
"You don't believe in 2012?! You gotta do some more reading."
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
to be fair, the car that he's getting the custom carbon-fibre body on could be worth $120,000, so then yes, it would be cheaper than buying a new one.eh_d wrote:ugh this is repulsiveBlack Jacques wrote:There are a couple law firms on the floors above my office so I'm in the elevator every day with these fucking cunty lawyers.
"Well there's this place in Austin that will put one of those custom carbon-fibre bodies on it so I might ship it down there"
"Oh? how much does that cost?"
"Eh, about $70K includinhg transport"
"Pfff.. cheaper than a new car"
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
Client I just spent 3 weeks of 16 hour days in Korea complained to my boss about my "heart not being in it"
+ He told them get fucked
- in a diplomatic way
+ He told them get fucked
- in a diplomatic way
Certified Poster
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
"You mean I have to pay you my deductible? DO you offer a payment plan?"
Me:"That's OK, I'll just hold on to your car until its paid in full. And oh, by the way, Your rental is due back by 5PM today. Have a nice weekend."
Me:"That's OK, I'll just hold on to your car until its paid in full. And oh, by the way, Your rental is due back by 5PM today. Have a nice weekend."
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
guy i was partnered with yesterday was discussing "metal" with me, as we were listening to 70's judas priest in the truck, when he dropped a couple of gems:
"i thought disturbed was the heaviest thing in the world until i heard nightwish."
"so i bet you really like insane clown posse."
"what the fuck?? no! what the hell makes you say that?"
"isn't that shit metal?"
"fuck no... it's angsty white hip hop for retards."
"wow. i did not know that. i thought it was metal."
"i thought disturbed was the heaviest thing in the world until i heard nightwish."
"so i bet you really like insane clown posse."
"what the fuck?? no! what the hell makes you say that?"
"isn't that shit metal?"
"fuck no... it's angsty white hip hop for retards."
"wow. i did not know that. i thought it was metal."
- Necrometer
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
after getting an email for people at the university who hadn't signed some stupid patent agreement, I am now getting a new email every five minutes from the subhumans who either can't figure out not to reply to the whole list with their "I don't have to sign this" reply, are yelling at everyone not to reply-all, or actually think it's funny to make "jokes" about how it's impossible to prevent the inevitable reply-all...
seething with hatred
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
"It's my week to clean the bathroom... where do you keep the urine pies?"
elephants gerald wrote:
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
Group of dudes discussing beer:
"Dogfish Head is disgusting, and they ferment it 30 minutes until it basically has to be scraped up"
"America sucks at making beer - they make some good ales but not beer"
"Dogfish Head is disgusting, and they ferment it 30 minutes until it basically has to be scraped up"
"America sucks at making beer - they make some good ales but not beer"
copstache wrote: fisshhshticksss
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
garden gnome guy with eunuchvoice trying and failing to send a fax in here, making me insane
BEEP BEEP BEEP CHIRP BEEP
DIALTONE
EE OO EE OO EE OO EE OO
WE'RE SORRY YOUR CALL CANNOT [etc]
fuck
BEEP BEEP BEEP CHIRP BEEP
DIALTONE
EE OO EE OO EE OO EE OO
WE'RE SORRY YOUR CALL CANNOT [etc]
fuck
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
Here's a fun little exchange I got to overhear..
Carpenter Foreman (to Apprentice Carpenter #1): Hurry the fuck up, Junior!
Apprentice Carpenter: Instead of Junior, could you call me "J-Dawg"?
Carpenter Foreman: How 'bout I fuckin' call ya "Chihuahua"?
Apprentice Carpenter: Call me "Chi-Chi".
Ex-Con Journeyman Carpenter: In jail they'd call the punks "Chi-Chi".
Carpenter Foreman: Chi-Chi it is!
Carpenter Foreman (to Apprentice Carpenter #1): Hurry the fuck up, Junior!
Apprentice Carpenter: Instead of Junior, could you call me "J-Dawg"?
Carpenter Foreman: How 'bout I fuckin' call ya "Chihuahua"?
Apprentice Carpenter: Call me "Chi-Chi".
Ex-Con Journeyman Carpenter: In jail they'd call the punks "Chi-Chi".
Carpenter Foreman: Chi-Chi it is!
Haha,
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
Co-Worker "SO, they were happy with the shippment?"
My Boss "Oh they were happier than Clams in Shit!"
My Boss "Oh they were happier than Clams in Shit!"
Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
co-worker: gawd why don't we ever have any pens around here.
me: because we work in a rehab clinic which is why i always bring my own and keep it on me, you should try it some time.
co-worker: [acting as if she didn't even hear me] t had to write with a highlighter pen. thanks for not leaving yours for me.
me: and that's precisely why i still have a pen and you're writing a note with a highlighter like a 5th grader.
*she doesn't work there anymore.
me: because we work in a rehab clinic which is why i always bring my own and keep it on me, you should try it some time.
co-worker: [acting as if she didn't even hear me] t had to write with a highlighter pen. thanks for not leaving yours for me.
me: and that's precisely why i still have a pen and you're writing a note with a highlighter like a 5th grader.
*she doesn't work there anymore.
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
haha, what is the mailbox size limit?
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
You should record this sound, and add WUBWUBWUB, become the next dubstep All-Star.Necrometer wrote:garden gnome guy with eunuchvoice trying and failing to send a fax in here, making me insane
BEEP BEEP BEEP CHIRP BEEP
DIALTONE
EE OO EE OO EE OO EE OO
WE'RE SORRY YOUR CALL CANNOT [etc]
fuck
Eat shit and live...
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
Entry violates standard of "heard" because it's written; also it's way more sad than infuriat--you know what I'll just say it
Here's a handwritten note from a client:
I feel like I need a hug
Here's a handwritten note from a client:
I rough want I could the other I din't unstand
Harold
I feel like I need a hug
- Deadhouse
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
For some reason we were talking about music at work.
Me - ..I'm not really into punk except for the Misfits and some of the Ramones stuff..."
Co-worker 1 - "Wait, the Ramones are considered a punk band? Since when?"
Co-worker 2 - "I always thought the Ramones were an alternative band like Korn."
Co-Worker 1 - "Yeah when you say punk I think bands like Green Day..."
Me - ..I'm not really into punk except for the Misfits and some of the Ramones stuff..."
Co-worker 1 - "Wait, the Ramones are considered a punk band? Since when?"
Co-worker 2 - "I always thought the Ramones were an alternative band like Korn."
Co-Worker 1 - "Yeah when you say punk I think bands like Green Day..."
- Deadhouse
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Re: Dumb things I've heard at work: The Thread
I don't know enough about scarves and ironic facial hair to have a valid opinion.TheDOAD wrote:maybe you should talk about the mpls henry's instead.