Are the muscliest guys here also the most single?

[Spooky Apparition]

Better be alone than in bad company.
Funny how society puts the emphasis on coupledom like it's a sign of success and all.
Long term relationship mean the end of personal growth sometimes, pretty often actually, just look around.
It seems like most long term couples are often together out of fear to be alone more than anything.

I think the cultural tendency, at least in America, has been towards singledom as of late, maybe since the early 90s. based on who I've interacted with in my (young) adult life, being in a long term relationship is seen as a weakness, much like your last comment hints at.

anyway, I think the most obvious reason why the muscliest dudes are single (not that I've ever noticed that, I'm using the OP's assertion) is that body building isn't a hobby that usually lends itself well to the majority of females--or males for that matter. a lot of hobbies can be engaged in with other people and be made more enjoyable, but I think the amount of work that goes into bodybuilding goes way beyond having a workout buddy every now and then.

[riley-o]

well, i think you will run into problems going in with any sort of presupposition that getting big or muscular or in shape is solely or even mostly based on being attractive to the opposite sex. i'm sure for some guys that's a starting out motivation but i don't think most people can stick it out for that. you either do it because some part of you enjoys the challenge and experience and endorphins or you don't do it. i can't speak on body building too much because i don't spend much time in the weight room these days but when i did it was always about the challenge of pushing numbers and myself; i was never thinking oh man the babes are going to love these guns (until after the workout-- but at that point it's incidental). granted i was never as dedicated to lifting as a few of the guys here but i'm convinced they would tell you that sort of dedication doesn't come from an outside thing like bitches, it comes from inside.

[Hell-haine]

I'm going to take the example of my husband (because, he's the muscle guy I know best!)
For a longtime, all he cared about was working out, music and his job.
He was satisfied with all that, focusing his efforts on getting and staying in shape, playing music and be good at his job.
He had a few girlfriends, but when things would get a little complicated or dramatic, he would gladly go back to the single life without fear, knowing that he'd find pretty much all the comfort he needed in doing his favorite activities.
When you are self-sufficient, you don't have to settle , you can gather nectar from flower to flower and lead your life the way you intend to.
If I wasn't married, that's what I'd be doing too.
Hell, I'm by myself most of the time anyway, I'm content exercising a little, spending time with my pets and friends, listening to my music, reading, watching whatever movies I feel like watching. Obviously, it's nice to have someone close taking care of me once in a while, giving me moral and financial support sometimes but one doesn't have to be in a relationship to get that, right?

I realize I'm mostly talking about living a single life, because I don't think "muscles" have much to do with "attracting females".
I think when you work out and shape your body a certain way, you do it for personal satisfaction and health benefits more than anything.
If being in shape attracts someone like-minded and healthy mentally as well as physically, then it's just the cherry on the cake.

Anyway, blah blah blah...

[Hypnagogia]

Better be alone than in bad company.
Funny how society puts the emphasis on coupledom like it's a sign of success and all.
Long term relationship mean the end of personal growth sometimes, pretty often actually, just look around.
It seems like most long term couples are often together out of fear to be alone more than anything.

I think the cultural tendency, at least in America, has been towards singledom as of late, maybe since the early 90s. based on who I've interacted with in my (young) adult life, being in a long term relationship is seen as a weakness, much like your last comment hints at.

no way.
people are certainly getting married at an older age, but it's still socially expected that you get married.
...and just being in a committed relationship isn't enough; "common law" marriage is a myth.

[Necrometer]

I've never met a man in my entire life who worked out because he wanted to look good for women.

Jesus christ, don't be obtuse. You have a good point about the obsession not being necessary for sexual attraction. The stuff below sort of applies to where the pride stems from... but yeah I can see how it's gratifying to be in the top 1% of the muscliest and least fat guys for totally non-sexual reasons; you're a freaking action figure and you look like power/force/strength walking around.

you either do it because some part of you enjoys the challenge and experience and endorphins or you don't do it.

All of this is fine, but why not eat shitloads more pizza/icecream than you do. Being chubby is not going to cancel out ANY of those positives you listed.

[Hell-haine]

As someone mentioned too, lifting weight is very individualistic anyway.
Most women (me) are like "you're going to the gym, agaaaaaaain?" when I'd rather have been canoeing or riding a bike with him.
But I've learned to use my alone time very well and nobody tells me I don't paddle fast enough or ride my bike wrong hehe!

[hana maru]

no way.
people are certainly getting married at an older age, but it's still socially expected that you get married.
...and just being in a committed relationship isn't enough; "common law" marriage is a myth.

what is socially expected can be quite varied on where you live (and work). here (arizona) living with someone with no intention of marriage is just by most - so many "when are you getting married?!" questions. but i know it's not the same everywhere.

[amos galore]

Sort of like the women who are fashion obsessed, but care more about other women's reactions than men's.

I'm pretty sure that's all women..... if a guy is going to admire a lady's Marc Jacobs bag, he's probably also thinking about dick......

You know about Marc Jacobs. You and maybe 4 other guys on the board.

[Necrometer]

BTW, the friend who indirectly inspired this thread is open about how being more appealing to women is/was a motivation for him to get into bodybuilding and maintain his physique. But the insane irony is that his lifestyle is a complete downer for a would-be girlfriend: his life is scheduled around lifts and cardio, and his diet is a strict 6 meals per day of raw ingredients dumped into tupperware. Not very conducive to luv.

[hana maru]

As someone mentioned too, lifting weight is very individualistic anyway.
Most women (me) are like "you're going to the gym, agaaaaaaain?"

or "the comic book store agaaaaaaaaaaaaaain??"
or "you're STILL playing that game???"
or "you bought MORE records???"
or or or

seems that it's just when things get to an obsessive nature that it's a turn off. a guy that is health conscious and keeps fit is great - as long as he's doing it for himself and it doesn't consume him. same for other things.

but i'm generally turned off by muscley guys because...

it implies to women that these jar head fitness jackoffs are self absorbed and self obsessed.

[Necrometer]

Better be alone than in bad company.
Funny how society puts the emphasis on coupledom like it's a sign of success and all.
Long term relationship mean the end of personal growth sometimes, pretty often actually, just look around.
It seems like most long term couples are often together out of fear to be alone more than anything.

I think the cultural tendency, at least in America, has been towards singledom as of late, maybe since the early 90s. based on who I've interacted with in my (young) adult life, being in a long term relationship is seen as a weakness, much like your last comment hints at.

no way.
people are certainly getting married at an older age, but it's still socially expected that you get married.
...and just being in a committed relationship isn't enough; "common law" marriage is a myth.

He said "towards" and I think he's right. More singleness overall, even if it is half a percent or something. And you're pretty obviously bitter to be getting married on terms other than your own. Or is the deed already done?

[Hell-haine]

Yeah, no. I love food too much to deal with this kind of lifestyle.
My muscle guy looks like a husbear nowadays anyway.

[Bored, Esq.]

Jesus christ, don't be obtuse.

You asked questions, I answered.

[Raw Ting]

I don't know man. While I am married, when I am working out I am thinking about men.

[barfingawesome]

Wow, I think i've dated you before.....

My thoughts exactly on all subjects. I always date girls who don't feel whole without being with somebody, where as i'm content being single or dating. Most girls simply can't understand this.

I lift weights for endorphins and making me feel good about myself. Since I'm content with life/singleness, being 'attractive' body wise just makes it easier for me to fall into situations with girls, without too much effort. I used to be obsessed, but now I go 3 days a week and enjoy life a lot more.

Girl situations have never been a problem, and shouldn't be unless your confidence/selfesteem/personality is fucked, nevermind looks.

I'm going to take the example of my husband (because, he's the muscle guy I know best!)
For a longtime, all he cared about was working out, music and his job.
He was satisfied with all that, focusing his efforts on getting and staying in shape, playing music and be good at his job.
He had a few girlfriends, but when things would get a little complicated or dramatic, he would gladly go back to the single life without fear, knowing that he'd find pretty much all the comfort he needed in doing his favorite activities.
When you are self-sufficient, you don't have to settle , you can gather nectar from flower to flower and lead your life the way you intend to.
If I wasn't married, that's what I'd be doing too.
Hell, I'm by myself most of the time anyway, I'm content exercising a little, spending time with my pets and friends, listening to my music, reading, watching whatever movies I feel like watching. Obviously, it's nice to have someone close taking care of me once in a while, giving me moral and financial support sometimes but one doesn't have to be in a relationship to get that, right?

I realize I'm mostly talking about living a single life, because I don't think "muscles" have much to do with "attracting females".
I think when you work out and shape your body a certain way, you do it for personal satisfaction and health benefits more than anything.
If being in shape attracts someone like-minded and healthy mentally as well as physically, then it's just the cherry on the cake.

Anyway, blah blah blah...

[riley-o]

you either do it because some part of you enjoys the challenge and experience and endorphins or you don't do it.

All of this is fine, but why not eat shitloads more pizza/icecream than you do. Being chubby is not going to cancel out ANY of those positives you listed.

well for me personally, as this question seems to be directed directly at me, shit i don't know if you've ever tried to function at a high level of athletics (which doesn't mean lifting weights for an hour after work on MWF, i mean dedication to five or six days a week twice a day workouts) when your diet consists of pizza and iced cream and various junk as the staples of your diet but let me let you in on a little tip: your body doesn't work that way. now if we're talking about strictly body building that's another matter but even then you're going to have much better, longer, more effective workouts if you put good fuel in your body.

honestly this question is so stupid that even though i'm giving you a real response i want you to know that i'm assuming you're trolling here.

[fallbacktostone]

haha im so proud of you riles

[Bored, Esq.]

There are plenty of bodybuilders who have either girlfriends or wives. It's not so monastic that one can't also be in a relationship. If "having a girlfriend" means going out to eat all the time, partying, spending lots of time doing nothing, etc. then...no, it's going to be difficult. Lots of women might have problems with a man having his own obsessions...but those women are idiots anyway and besides...fuck what women think. That should never be an issue.

[eyehatethehumanrace]

ask Rosary Butt Beads

[Hypnagogia]

Better be alone than in bad company.
Funny how society puts the emphasis on coupledom like it's a sign of success and all.
Long term relationship mean the end of personal growth sometimes, pretty often actually, just look around.
It seems like most long term couples are often together out of fear to be alone more than anything.

I think the cultural tendency, at least in America, has been towards singledom as of late, maybe since the early 90s. based on who I've interacted with in my (young) adult life, being in a long term relationship is seen as a weakness, much like your last comment hints at.

no way.
people are certainly getting married at an older age, but it's still socially expected that you get married.
...and just being in a committed relationship isn't enough; "common law" marriage is a myth.

He said "towards" and I think he's right. More singleness overall, even if it is half a percent or something. And you're pretty obviously bitter to be getting married on terms other than your own. Or is the deed already done?

People getting married later in life, coupled with a higher than ever divorce rate means that people are spending more time being single...but also spending more time looking for ways to no longer be single.
The cultural still identifies marriage as "normal".

Anyway, I'm not bitter about my marriage. I still think the ceremony itself is silly and a waste of money, but I've long given up trying to understand why it means so much to her. If not for her need to have a ceremony, we'd have gotten a certificate at the courthouse a long time ago.

[riley-o]

"you're going to the gym, agaaaaaaain?"

or "the comic book store agaaaaaaaaaaaaaain??"
or "you're STILL playing that game???"
or "you bought MORE records???"
or or or

hahahaha i'm guilty of all of this

[Kurt Russell's Beard]

I worked out a couple years ago and got really fit, nothing totally muscley or anything. I was more social than not. I found myself wanting to go out a lot. I dated. I got a girlfriend. Just by my very (very) limited experience, I got 722% more attention from women while I was lifting weights. I'm going by the assumption that women (gasp!) actually like physically fit and attractive men! Oh my god! And now that I'm pregnant with my pizza-baby, my weiner is very lonely. All the muscley guys I see around me are not single. But that's anectodal.

[Cryptoplasty]

All of you, with the exception of Jofa, will end up in long term relationships or married. How many people do you know above the age of 35 are single and happy? You will come to the realization that you don't want to die alone. Having someone around to suck your dick without having to put in effort is always nice too. When you're in your 20's and early 30's you spend all your time fucking lots of woman, but you know that won't last forever.

This has nothing to do with weightlifting......

[The Torsion]

It's feast or famine with females. Most women are a spectacular waste of time. Most men probably are, too. I get so fucking disgusted at how people think you should just be 'content' with who you are. Fuck that. Be intense about something. So many low-impact sadsacks resting on their laurels and living vicariously through televised sports. Always strive for something better, never be satisfied. Losers are satisfied. Like I give a shit if fucking Mari Mar or Hamelia don't find me attractive. The feeling is mutual. I'm not a goddamn bodybuilder anyway. I lift weights an engage in intensive strength training because it's exciting and it fuels my fucking ego when I top what I could do before.

[Hypnagogia]

you either do it because some part of you enjoys the challenge and experience and endorphins or you don't do it.

All of this is fine, but why not eat shitloads more pizza/icecream than you do. Being chubby is not going to cancel out ANY of those positives you listed.

well for me personally, as this question seems to be directed directly at me, shit i don't know if you've ever tried to function at a high level of athletics (which doesn't mean lifting weights for an hour after work on MWF, i mean dedication to five or six days a week twice a day workouts) when your diet consists of pizza and iced cream and various junk as the staples of your diet but let me let you in on a little tip: your body doesn't work that way. now if we're talking about strictly body building that's another matter but even then you're going to have much better, longer, more effective workouts if you put good fuel in your body.

honestly this question is so stupid that even though i'm giving you a real response i want you to know that i'm assuming you're trolling here.

I think you missed his point; he was saying why body build? why not challenge yourself & feel endorphins in other ways, such as eating the most pizzas, etc.
...and part of the answer to that question is that it's about more than just challenging yourself, or how you make yourself feel, as you claimed; it's also about how you make yourself appear to others.