I want amelia to be my wife.

[VueeeuVueeeeuV]

At worst it woul be a sham, but it would be grand times.

[Hypnagogia]

[soiled depends]

this is going to be an awesome thread, I can just tell!!!!!

[VueeeuVueeeeuV]

OUR LOVE WILL SMASH YOUR BOUNDARY OF CYNICISM.

[soiled depends]

what's going to be so different than any other fucking thread that starts like this?

[VueeeuVueeeeuV]

I didn't read them, and I started this one my self.

[soiled depends]

you're a fucking idiot.

[VueeeuVueeeeuV]

THE INVERSE IS TRUE.

[Mari_Mar]

"You shoulda put a ring on it."

[Ogre of Disgust]

The Adventures of Closet Conservative and Yuckbutt

[Pyrite Medal of Ignorance]

What do you have to offer? My qualifications for wifely-hood are as follows:

-at least one (1) guaranteed meal per day, consisting mostly of the scraps left over from my over-seasoned yet somehow still bland meal
-unexplainable mood swings followed by intense periods of remorse and attempted reparation
-a marked lack of desire for regular physical intimacy that isn't immediately preceded by the ingestion of druga and/or alcohol
-drunken blackouts characterized by repetition of stories and theme, often accompanied by manic and extremely obnoxious behavior and/or screaming
-an incredible surplus of empathy that sometimes makes it easy to manipulate me into doing things for you, like stealing sandwiches or killing child rapists
-a never ending cloud of pot smoke to get totally second hand cancer'd by
-i'll probably have sex with your bandmate/ex girlfriend/coworker/best friend/brother if we break up, and expect you to be totally fine with it
-i only want to do the things i want to do, and when i want to do them. so if you're not similarly-minded or totally trainable with good potential for conversion then this isn't going to work

there's probably more stuff, but that should give you a general idea of what you're getting into...

also, if i get married we're getting tattoos instead of rings. you can take a ring off for a night out on the town, but a tattoo of my face over your face is forever....

[43°29′28″N 83°23′49″W]

I make fun of her all the time, but she has very nice titties.

Also, I sent Maery a message on X-Box Live a month or so ago telling her I loved her. Totally ignored me!

[Wehttam]

[Friendly Goatus]

Amelia's Foed

[Pyrite Medal of Ignorance]

were you sharper before, or was I just not paying attention?

huh?

[Bored, Esq.]

Also, I sent Maery a message on X-Box Live a month or so ago telling her I loved her. Totally ignored me!

Shit, son. Missed your chance.

[eddie munster]

have you done anal at least once amelia?

[Pyrite Medal of Ignorance]

I was born without a butthole, though I have allowed many a gentleman caller to vigorously plunge their staffs deep within the confines of my crowded colostomy bag.

[VueeeuVueeeeuV]

-at least one (1) guaranteed meal per day, consisting mostly of the scraps left over from my over-seasoned yet somehow still bland meal
-unexplainable mood swings followed by intense periods of remorse and attempted reparation
-a marked lack of desire for regular physical intimacy that isn't immediately preceded by the ingestion of druga and/or alcohol
-drunken blackouts characterized by repetition of stories and theme, often accompanied by manic and extremely obnoxious behavior and/or screaming
-an incredible surplus of empathy that sometimes makes it easy to manipulate me into doing things for you, like stealing sandwiches or killing child rapists
-a never ending cloud of pot smoke to get totally second hand cancer'd by
-i'll probably have sex with your bandmate/ex girlfriend/coworker/best friend/brother if we break up, and expect you to be totally fine with it
-i only want to do the things i want to do, and when i want to do them. so if you're not similarly-minded or totally trainable with good potential for conversion then this isn't going to work

Fine with me except
0. I am not going to touch any food unless I cook it myself or it comes from a restaurant.
1. If you repeat yourself too much i will psychoanalyze you poorly(i think people who repeat themselves offen are affirming what they know to be false)
2. fuck anyone I dont fucking care
3. I just would prefer you to be awake after midnight at least 45 percent of the time.I will be busy listening to podcasts about science and reading about stupid shit online.

Other than that, it can be nothing but a joyride into the frame shop.

on my side I will.
1. probably not want to be physically moved
2. want to go stupid places at random times but not talk to anyone there.
3. be really cheap and bring home "awesome" things i find on the street like furniture and broken electronics.

[Pyrite Medal of Ignorance]

hm. are you thin and effeminate? i generally try to stick to guys that are how i see myself if i were born male.

[VueeeuVueeeeuV]

I am only thin to the eyes of hicks who's eyes rebell if they see someone under two hundred pounds. I would not count as "fat" most places though. I think I could be sometimes seen as androgynous though not really effeminate. I could pass for a really manly bulldyke if you are really drunk.

[43°29′28″N 83°23′49″W]

Also, I sent Maery a message on X-Box Live a month or so ago telling her I loved her. Totally ignored me!

Shit, son. Missed your chance.

I still have my memories. No one can take those away from me.

[Pyrite Medal of Ignorance]

I am only thin to the eyes of hicks who's eyes rebell if they see someone under two hundred pounds. I would not count as "fat" most places though. I think I could be sometimes seen as androgynous though not really effeminate. I could pass for a really manly bulldyke if you are really drunk.

i'm going to have to see pics before i sign anything.

[death by snoo snoo]

Just please don't reproduce. I don't think the world is ready for that much ginger.

[Pistol Whip]

Wouldn't make her my wife but would make the sex with and play with her nice tatas!