humblebrag thread

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Necrometer
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Sun Jul 07, 2019 12:27 pm

this is a thread for you to say your humblebrags. I am not sure if you should be trying to nullify the humblebragginess or not, but maybe let's lean YES because we don't want the board to die with us all actually hating each other

here goes

when I wear a dress shirt, I like to have the sleeves rolled up, but it's nearly impossible to do while wearing a shirt that fits properly. so I typically pre-roll the sleeves before putting the shirt on, which is annoying to do, but also makes me think "oooh my arms are big/strong" (which I know is objectively not true - there was a time when I was more built, but that time is gone forever) and then I feel embarrassed for my own thought
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Jimm O' Lation
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Sun Jul 07, 2019 3:27 pm

why do you want to know these things?
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Necrometer
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Sun Jul 07, 2019 4:17 pm

for the book I'm writing about the forum
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good thing I'll be dead soon, cause I'm tired of liars winning
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riley-o
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Mon Jul 08, 2019 2:39 am

For the first time since I started, I posted a video on social media of me doing BJJ and my mom sent me a message that I was good

She seemed genuinely surprised that I didn’t suck :lol: :lol:
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THE KILL
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Tue Jul 09, 2019 11:36 am

riley-o wrote:
Mon Jul 08, 2019 2:39 am
For the first time since I started, I posted a video on social media of me doing BJJ and my mom sent me a message that I was good

She seemed genuinely surprised that I didn’t suck :lol: :lol:
post the video
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Tue Jul 09, 2019 6:28 pm

I’ve been in a new position at my job for less than a month and I’m already number one out of all the employees.


I’m king turd on shit mountain.
Everything will be okay until the poor learn to make atom bombs in their basements
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riley-o
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Tue Jul 09, 2019 9:31 pm

THE KILL wrote:
Tue Jul 09, 2019 11:36 am
riley-o wrote:
Mon Jul 08, 2019 2:39 am
For the first time since I started, I posted a video on social media of me doing BJJ and my mom sent me a message that I was good

She seemed genuinely surprised that I didn’t suck :lol: :lol:
post the video
I thought you'd never ask 8)

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THE KILL
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Wed Jul 10, 2019 6:18 am

riley-o wrote:
Tue Jul 09, 2019 9:31 pm

Nice sweeps, mate!
The Bill wrote:Kids today with their artificially flavored kunt hands!
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Wed Aug 07, 2019 12:00 am

riley your contribution was so good. mompliments :brokenheart:


I am working so fucking hard lately - writing multiple proposals due way too soon - that it's gradually making me blind. there's a name for it: pseudomyopia. to prevent this, I have taken to doing a bunch of writing in a conference room, with my in-progress document projected onto a screen like 20 feet away from me. it actually helps! so if any of you are writing a book or something... maybe try this one simple trick? (ophthalmologists hate me) this also feels ultra wasteful since the projector is a beast. it's like when my sister drives around with the AC on and the windows down.
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riley-o
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Wed Aug 07, 2019 3:00 am

I missed BJJ tonight because I had to go in and work for 12 hours on my day off

I normally would be pretty annoyed, but when you’ve just received your third promotion in less than 12 months, you sometimes have to make sacrifices
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Wed Aug 07, 2019 9:24 am

Starting a new gig a few k more than expected and talked them into working remotely instead of moving to Napa like the description originally asked for 👍
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Wed Aug 07, 2019 4:26 pm

36 packs of budweiser are now on sale down the street from me for 19.99. this is as close to a humblebrag as im going to get
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Wed Aug 07, 2019 5:17 pm

:lol: :lol: :lol: verno
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tried to make an ideal wife. she had a burn in the center of her forehead..
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Thu Aug 08, 2019 11:50 am

ghost boner wrote:
Wed Aug 07, 2019 4:26 pm
36 packs of budweiser are now on sale down the street from me for 19.99. this is as close to a humblebrag as im going to get
See if you can house all of this in an evening.
MeatGrease wrote:I think New Jersey has permanently fucked up my DNA
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Thu Aug 08, 2019 12:45 pm

fuck it might be soon actually. its getting to the point where ill drink and 18 pack and just go to bed cause im bored. this is getting scary
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Fri Aug 09, 2019 3:30 pm

well now out of nowhere i have a humblebrag. my friend has been staying with me for a while and asked if he could bring a girl over to hang out. i said sure ask her to bring a friend for me. she did. the girl for me sucked and was retarded to all hell but his chick was really cool. whatever, he can have her its his friend anyway. anyway they take off and my friend goes with them. they hang out for a few days but hes kinda seeing someone else already and he doesnt wanna get caught up. in any case shes been coming by somewhat often and hangs out. she added me on fb the other day and hit me up like 'hey drinking buddy! what are you doing! you got me drinking a lot lately' blah blah blah. i know this is a scam trying to see where my friend is at because she knows about him seeing the other girl so i reply with 'oh haha crazy' or whatever minimal shit i can just to avoid him coming up. he never comes up but thats basically the whole convo. cut to a few days later she asks when my birthday is and can she come over and bring me a cake. again i think shes trying to make small talk before she asks about my friends whereabouts. small talk again, no mention of friend. on my birthday she sent me 3 birthday gif emojis and said im one of the coolest people she ever met and cant wait to hang out. i hung out with her last night with friend and my cousin. friend went to sleep and cousin took off. nice, just her and i now. like 20 seconds goes by and my cousin calls me crying that i need to pick him up. he and his gf got in a fight and he got out of the car. anyway she takes me to go get him and things kind of end there. she just texted me today and said shes coming over.

on the right

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Fri Aug 09, 2019 4:02 pm

:putin :cheers: :bigdog:
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Sat Aug 10, 2019 12:14 am

jyfihp

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canon.docre wrote:I will not be seduced by the cheap showiness of nature.
FVBTVS wrote:
Tue Nov 10, 2015 7:58 am
tried to make an ideal wife. she had a burn in the center of her forehead..
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riley-o
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Sat Aug 10, 2019 6:14 pm

That’s the best post in this thread ❤️
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Sat Aug 10, 2019 9:00 pm

I was so happy to see Vern's post in this thread

...on my work laptop, from the company that makes luxury weed
Jimm O' Lation
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Sun Aug 11, 2019 8:03 am

hopefully this will encourage him to clean up his act.i recall him being work shy, and everyone here seemed to be okay with that :?
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Sun Aug 11, 2019 11:56 am

well now i might be wrong i have no clue whats going on. i think she really might have had some long running methodical master plan somehow? i think she just wanted to see dude again. she came over and we had a few beers after i posted that and talked and it was fun but when friend got home he was surprised she was there. i didnt even think to tell him. anyway he goes in the shower and we go back to drinking and shes like "omg he didnt even give me a hug!" and im like ok? we go back to talking about other stuff and shes going to leave to get her (another red flag) 4 kids. so i go to walk her outside and on the way out friend is out of the shower and shes like "arent you going to give me a hug?" and hes all weird about it but does. i walk her to her car and she give me a hug and says we should hang out soon and then immediately asks why friend is being weird. im like i dunno see ya. "fuck it" i think. this girl is just hott and im falling right into her trap. so i decide to not talk to her again. i walk back outside and she left her charger here. i text her that and thats it and she starts up a convo again with no mention of friend either. text back and forth all night til i knock out. next day i decide again im not going to talk to her. went to a family party at 1 and started drinking immediately. now its 11pm. ive had a lot of beers and whiskey. i text her. friend comes up. he told her he has a gf and can never talk to her again. blocked her on all social media. thats really all she mentioned. we talk all night and i ask if she wants to hang out again. i guess on tuesday were going to dinner and a movie? wtf am i doing guys?

also, work shy?
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Sun Aug 11, 2019 12:03 pm

ghost boner wrote:
Sun Aug 11, 2019 11:56 am
(another red flag) 4 kids
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Chad wrote:
Wed May 15, 2019 4:01 pm
cool dudes like us
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Sun Aug 11, 2019 12:05 pm

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Chad wrote:
Wed May 15, 2019 4:01 pm
cool dudes like us
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Sun Aug 11, 2019 12:05 pm

hahahaha BUT SHES SO HOTT!
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