Post real simple but delicious recipes

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THE KILL
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and please, a sandwich is not a proper dish, no matter how well-constructed you think your sandwiches are...

Spaghetti Alio Olio with cherry tomatoes
What you need (per person):
- Spaghetti
- 3 to 4 table spoons of Olive Oil (the higher the quality the better, obviously. Better get a tiny bottle of the really expensive stuff)
- 3 to 4 cloves of garlic
- one small spicy pepper (or more, depending on how spicy you want your sauce)
- a good handful of cherry tomatoes

Get the Spaghetti boiling. Heat up the olive oil in a pan, but only to a moderate heat (like 4 out of ten) - you don't want the garlic to get brown. Slice the garlic, throw it in the pan. Gently fry the garlic for a bout five minutes, then add the cherry tomatoes and the chopped up pepper. Give it a couple more minutes until the tomatoes have turned to mush (if you prefer, you can just heat them up a bit and leave them intact). Salt and pepper to taste, mix with the Spaghetti.

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It’s not real spaghetti unless it takes four hours to make in a kitchen that has at least two windows.
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Eight Bit Alien
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THE KILL wrote: Sun Jun 13, 2021 11:50 am Slice the garlic, throw it in the pan. Gently fry the garlic for a bout five minutes, then add the cherry tomatoes and the chopped up pepper.[/img]
With any recipe like this, my dad had this wonderful system for doing the garlic. He used a razor and he used to slice it so thin that it would liquefy in the pan with just a little oil. It was a very good system.
Zerohero wrote: Fri Oct 16, 2020 10:59 am cleaning out old stuff in the freezer--- old slice of leftover pizza..boom eaten back to life
cxwx
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Eight Bit Alien wrote: Sun Jun 13, 2021 3:30 pm
THE KILL wrote: Sun Jun 13, 2021 11:50 am Slice the garlic, throw it in the pan. Gently fry the garlic for a bout five minutes, then add the cherry tomatoes and the chopped up pepper.
With any recipe like this, my dad had this wonderful system for doing the garlic. He used a razor and he used to slice it so thin that it would liquefy in the pan with just a little oil. It was a very good system.


He probably put too many onions in. I mean don’t get me wrong, it was still a really good sauce.
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Eight Bit Alien
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This recipe blew my mind recently. You'll be looking for some kind of trick or extra part here but there is none.

1. Get a medium-to-large onion and dont do anything to it
2. Spray up a pan
3. Put the onion in the oven for 40 minutes at 350
4. It's done. Eat it
Zerohero wrote: Fri Oct 16, 2020 10:59 am cleaning out old stuff in the freezer--- old slice of leftover pizza..boom eaten back to life
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krog
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I just grilled some squid and it was awesome. Get whole cleaned squid and slice them in half so they're flat. Rinse well, then toss in some lemon juice, olive oil, and oregano. Grill on high heat until just before it gets rubbery.
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krog
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Another simple one I've been grooving on a lot lately is Israeli salad. Dice up a cucumber, two tomatoes, and a red pepper, then add lemon juice, salt, and a bunch of dried mint. You can add crumbled feta if you want. Best after it sits for a couple hours.
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spacehamster
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1. Boil pasta of your choice for about 4 minutes or 2/3rds of the way. I like to use tagliatelle for this, but it really doesn't matter.
2. Heat up oil in a large frying pan
3. Add pine seeds, roast lightly
4. Add one crushed clove of garlic and one sliced chili per person. Stir for a minute or two. Make sure the garlic doesn't get burned.
5. Add about 200g of leaf spinach per person. The important thing here is that the spinach must be 100% dry. Water will ruin everything. Wait until it starts to collapse.
6. Add the pasta
7. Cut some gorgonzola into cubes and add.
8. Mix everything thoroughly and wait for the cheese to melt. Putting on a lid helps.
9. Add black pepper if the chili isn't enough.
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THE KILL
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cxwx wrote: Sun Jun 13, 2021 3:15 pm It’s not real spaghetti unless it takes four hours to make in a kitchen that has at least two windows.
Well, we borrow the pasta machine from the mother in law from time to time, but I've never made pasta by hand... I don't see the point, really. To be honest, I prefer dried pasta to freshly made pasta. :o
Eight Bit Alien wrote: Sun Jun 13, 2021 3:30 pm
THE KILL wrote: Sun Jun 13, 2021 11:50 am Slice the garlic, throw it in the pan. Gently fry the garlic for a bout five minutes, then add the cherry tomatoes and the chopped up pepper.[/img]
With any recipe like this, my dad had this wonderful system for doing the garlic. He used a razor and he used to slice it so thin that it would liquefy in the pan with just a little oil. It was a very good system.
Cool man, thanks for the tip, will try that out.
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THE KILL
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Oven vegetables (for culinary retards)

Cut up onions, sweet potatoes and/ or normal potatoes (slice them no thicker than half a centimeter or they will not be done at the same time as the other vegetables), and mushrooms (this is my favourite combination, but of course you can use most about any vegetable; even Brussels sprouts taste great when you roast them). Mix olive oil, salt, pepper, some chopped up Rosemary, and one to two tea spoons of paprika powder, throw the vegetables in, and mix properly. Put in the oven at ~200°C for roughly half an hour/ until the vegetables are crispy.
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Necrophilic Mallard
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Raw tortillas are the shit and worth a minute or 2 to cook on the stove

Double decker tacos:
Make regular hard shell tacos with your favorite fillings

Cook up some raw tortillas
Warm a can of refried beans
Smear on tortillas
Add hard shell to one edge of tortilla
Full the hard shell

Breakfast tacos
Cook bacon or breakfast sausage in oven; finish on fry pan to crisp as desired
While that's cooking, Fry up some french fries in bacon fat in a cast iron skillet
Cook raw tortillas
Scrambled eggs with lots of butter
Chop up sausage or bacon, and fries
Add Shredded sharp cheddar
Add hot sauce to taste

Street tacos:
Costco carnitas
Corn tortillas
Chopped cilantro
Thinly sliced radishes
Queso fresco
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Necrophilic Mallard
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THE KILL wrote: Mon Jun 14, 2021 2:40 pm Well, we borrow the pasta machine from the mother in law from time to time, but I've never made pasta by hand... I don't see the point, really. To be honest, I prefer dried pasta to freshly made pasta. :o
:what:
This is like preferring boxed Mac & cheese to home made
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pooptastik
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Fried Eggs over white rice

1. make rice
2. fry the egg (sunny side is how I like it) with pinch of salt & pepper
3. put the fried egg on top of the rice
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Toilet Fleet
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You can fry shallots in the microwave!!!!!! List en to what I'm s;ayoiang. to oyu!!!!!!!!!!

Slice up three shallots, put them in a half cup of whatever neutral oil you like. Zap for 5 minutes. Then zap in 2 minute increments until they're looking slightly toasted, then in 30 second increments until they're the degree of doneness you want

BONUS you also have shallot-infused oil, which is amazing for like fried eggs and shit like that

====================================
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THE KILL
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Necrophilic Mallard wrote: Mon Jun 14, 2021 7:58 pm
THE KILL wrote: Mon Jun 14, 2021 2:40 pm Well, we borrow the pasta machine from the mother in law from time to time, but I've never made pasta by hand... I don't see the point, really. To be honest, I prefer dried pasta to freshly made pasta. :o
:what:
This is like preferring boxed Mac & cheese to home made
I'm sorry to say I despise Mac'n Cheese... btw we usually use the pasta machine to make soba (for soups) anyway.
pooptastik wrote: Tue Jun 15, 2021 9:07 am Fried Eggs over white rice

1. make rice
2. fry the egg (sunny side is how I like it) with pinch of salt & pepper
3. put the fried egg on top of the rice
Toilet Fleet wrote: Tue Jun 15, 2021 9:45 am You can fry shallots in the microwave!!!!!! List en to what I'm s;ayoiang. to oyu!!!!!!!!!!

Slice up three shallots, put them in a half cup of whatever neutral oil you like. Zap for 5 minutes. Then zap in 2 minute increments until they're looking slightly toasted, then in 30 second increments until they're the degree of doneness you want

BONUS you also have shallot-infused oil, which is amazing for like fried eggs and shit like that

====================================
Those two just barely qualify as recipes...
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pooptastik
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okay, here's a different recipe:

>corn
>water
>450 f
>4 mins

or

>hotdog
>microwave
>6 mins
cxwx
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cxwx
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pooptastik wrote: Wed Jun 16, 2021 11:43 am okay, here's a different recipe:



>hotdog
>microwave
>6 mins
I tried five minutes and fifty nine seconds.

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warm tofu
lao gan ma
rice

ribbons of some greens or raw zucchini
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Eight Bit Alien
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WHY WOULD YOU MICROWAVE A HOT DOG FOR SIX MINUTES

AFTER LIKE 70 SECONDS THEY TURN INTO JERKY AND EXPLODE
Zerohero wrote: Fri Oct 16, 2020 10:59 am cleaning out old stuff in the freezer--- old slice of leftover pizza..boom eaten back to life
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THE KILL
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Post some more hilarious recipes, guys! Pfff, I try to bring some extremely dumbed down old-world sophistication to these unwashed new-worlders, and this is the thanks I get...
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THE KILL wrote: Thu Jun 17, 2021 5:09 am Post some more hilarious recipes, guys! Pfff, I try to bring some extremely dumbed down old-world sophistication to these unwashed new-worlders, and this is the thanks I get...
Yet you came in all spaghetti this, pasta that but still haven't specified when you put the salt in the water.

Hundreds of years of tradition at stake here!
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the awesome Assassin
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That's why you always gotta ask Raffo...
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