anyone else wanna vomit everytime nu cuntry music is played?

[Zerohero]

hey its JUST music, just some chords and some dude saying a buncha words... i enjoy my share of olde tyme dudes and can handle some americana stuff type waiz.. i'm sure its all made by same cast of studio aces on autopilot.

but really wanna vomit when exposed to that shit in public places..grocery stores, sports, klan rallys, restaurants... its an embracing of "Roseanne" culture. Shit headed and proud to be shit headed.

ok fuck this as a bitch thread... "y'all"....
y'aaall can rite you own nu cuntry song...GO:



Sittin' on da porch
sippin my hooch
gonna let them boots stay muddy
fishing tomorrow
in my monster truck
i'm just a red necked ace fish master
young but i'm old
wrangling them crayfish
for my mamma dun told
down the road
kids on the commode
im just a redneck ace daddy

(guaranteeed 1212x platinumnen..........)

[Zerohero]

pro tip:

don't make these too goot! you guys got talent in this department.. this are supposed to be REAL SHITTY

[kevin hash]

Nu country sucks....every bit of it.

I love when people at work try to turn me on to whatever country bullshit they are into. I always end up calling them idiots for liking that shit.

Some titles:
Grandpa's Bottle Grandma's Bible
American way Home
Snow Angels (Coming Home For Christmas)
Love It or Leave It
She's Into My Truck
Farm Town Friday Night
I Ain't Gettin Vaxxed
Where Did My Country Go
Hitler's Tractor

[THE KILL]

She's Into My Truck

oh man... nu country

[godofdeadlydeath]

The fucking production alone makes me angry. Just the same fucking way of producing the banjo, the lap steel, and the same shitty barely-overdriven "rock" guitar tones, before the overprocessed and autotuned vocals kick in, it's just so bland and commercial. I respect straight up pop music and R&B so much more than any nu-country

[Zerohero]

Nu country sucks....every bit of it.

I love when people at work try to turn me on to whatever country bullshit they are into. I always end up calling them idiots for liking that shit.

Some titles:
Grandpa's Bottle Grandma's Bible
American way Home
Snow Angels (Coming Home For Christmas)
Love It or Leave It
She's Into My Truck
Farm Town Friday Night
I Ain't Gettin Vaxxed
Where Did My Country Go
Hitler's Tractor

all great but no doubt Grandpa's Bottle Grandma's Bible is $$$$$$ in the bank. Morons will eat that topic up in droves.

[Eight Bit Alien]

The fucking production alone makes me angry. Just the same fucking way of producing the banjo, the lap steel, and the same shitty barely-overdriven "rock" guitar tones, before the overprocessed and autotuned vocals kick in, it's just so bland and commercial. I respect straight up pop music and R&B so much more than any nu-country

This is what kills me as well. The extreme processing on the vocals is absolutely bizarre. I've heard examples of the obligatory banjo or violin breakdown that were obviously MIDI instruments or sample libraries, as well.
Country is supposed to be about authenticity.

What's really funny to me is that it all sounds EXACTLY the same as nowadays urban r&b (R-kelley and after) - same fucking recipe, different facade glued on top. Two groups of Americans who often seem fated to be mortal enemies, but someone somewhere figured out how to sell the exact same brand of feelgood identity-product to both of 'em.... "just switch the label on the can, they wont know the difference..."

[Warpsmasher]

Dude looks like a lady autotuned aerosmith cover, done with serious admiration and reverence to the LEGENDS

Referencing old 80s hits is becoming its own stupid subgenre too, hate that shit so much.

I also work with a few proud members of the Trump Trux Klan and have seen each of them singin along to the nucountry at some point...

[Eight Bit Alien]

This shit is extremely popular with suburban soccer moms here in the Northeast, for what its worth - people who have absolutely no cultural or family connection to the South or West, never been near a ride-mower let alone a tractor, work at a bank...

But I beeen workin hard to bring the bacon home
So tell me why I'm drinkin here alone
I learn my lesson time and time again
I love you Lord, but you know sometimes I let the devil win

[MIDI banjo]

[solo EZKeys]
[Solo Hanneman]
[solo Himmler]

[godofdeadlydeath]

Growing up in Massachusetts in the 80s and 90s, unless you were from rural NH or Maine or you were a western Mass hick, you did NOT listen to country. There was maybe 1 or 2 country radio stations you could even get in the north of Boston area. Now there are at least 10 and they're all on huge stations that changed formats over the last 15 years. It's become the thing that suburban college girls are into these days instead of jam bands and folk pop, and it's fucking gross.

[Eight Bit Alien]

I wont let the world forget about this

What really makes it absolutely fucking fascinating is when LL Cool J comes on at the end - one of the craziest fucking things I've ever heard. The end part where they go verse-for-verse is from another goddamn planet.

To the man that waited on me
At the Starbucks down on Main
I hope you understand
When I put on that t-shirt
The only thing I meant to say
Is I'm a Skynyrd fan
The red flag on my chest somehow is
Like the elephant in the corner of the south
And I just walked him right in the room
Just a proud rebel son with an 'ol can of worms
Lookin' like I got a lot to learn


But from my point of view
I'm just a white man comin' to you from the southland
Tryin' to understand what it's like not to be
I'm proud of where I'm from but not everything we've done
And it ain't like you and me can re-write history
Our generation didn't start this nation
We're still pickin' up the pieces, walkin' on eggshells, fightin' over yesterday
And caught between southern pride and southern blame

They called it Reconstruction, fixed the buildings, dried some tears
We're still siftin' through the rubble after a hundred-fifty years
I try to put myself in your shoes and that's a good place to begin
But it ain't like I can walk a mile in someone else's skin

Cause I'm a white man livin' in the southland
Just like you I'm more than what you see
I'm proud of where I'm from but not everything we've done
And it ain't like you and me can re-write history
Our generation didn't start this nation
And we're still paying for the mistakes
That a bunch of folks made long before we came
And caught somewhere between southern pride and southern blame

Dear Mr. White Man, I wish you understood
What the world is really like when you're livin' in the hood
Just because my pants are saggin' doesn't mean I'm up to no good
You should try to get to know me, I really wish you would

Now my chains are gold but I'm still misunderstood
I wasn't there when Sherman's March turned the south into firewood
I want you to get paid but be a slave I never could
Feel like a new fangled Django, dodgin' invisible white hoods

So when I see that white cowboy hat, I'm thinkin' it's not all good
I guess we're both guilty of judgin' the cover not the book
I'd love to buy you a beer, conversate and clear the air
But I see that red flag and I think you wish I wasn't here

I'm just a white man
(If you don't judge my do-rag)
Comin' to you from the southland
(I won't judge your red flag)
Tryin' to understand what it's like not to be
I'm proud of where I'm from
(If you don't judge my gold chains)
But not everything we've done
(I'll forget the iron chains)
It ain't like you and me can re-write history
(Can't re-write history baby)
Oh, Dixieland
(The relationship between the Mason-Dixon needs some fixin')
I hope you understand what this is all about
(Quite frankly I'm a black Yankee but I've been thinkin' about this lately)
I'm a son of the new south
(The past is the past, you feel me)
And I just want to make things right
(Let bygones be bygones)
Where all that's left is southern pride
(RIP Robert E. Lee but I've gotta thank Abraham Lincoln for freeing me, know what I mean)
It's real, it's real
It's truth

[cxwx]

[Zerohero]

Got a plastic scrotum hanging from my rear view mirror
I watch high school football my autistic son aint gonna be no queer
I ain't gone no dentist and ain't getting no covid shot
goin' school is fer sissies my hound dog's dump still hot

[cxwx]

my hound dog's dump still hot

[THE KILL]

I wont let the world forget about this

What really makes it absolutely fucking fascinating is when LL Cool J comes on at the end - one of the craziest fucking things I've ever heard. The end part where they go verse-for-verse is from another goddamn planet.

That stuff sounds like it's straight out of South Park... man, what a retarded country

[zombiehead]

[Zerohero]

my hound dog's dump still hot

thank you fine sir, for truly elevating this here thread to greater heights, y'yall.

[Scott the what]

I do not allow myself to be exposed to that type of music.

[godofdeadlydeath]

Drew Tarver and Carl Tart do characters on Comedy Bang Bang as a fake band called Memphis Kansas Breeze and every song ultimately ends up being a love letter to their truck, and it's almost too accurate.

[Zerohero]

Drew Tarver and Carl Tart do characters on Comedy Bang Bang as a fake band called Memphis Kansas Breeze and every song ultimately ends up being a love letter to their truck, and it's almost too accurate.

Do they or any real bands have one about those plastic scrotums hanging under the trailer hitch?

I gotta wonder what them he-mans manly man tuff as nailz 6 wheel truck guys are feeling when they go to the autozone counter holding little plastic ballsack? Maybe they are more manly than that, galvanized steel ball sack... I guess not thinking about the homoerotic implications mind focused on shootin' mexicians crossing the border..

side note, dog shit handed preacher clip above probably deserves own thread. That deserves its own nu cuntry gospel song.