TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

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godofdeadlydeath
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

Post by godofdeadlydeath »

kevin hash wrote: Wed Apr 21, 2021 1:05 pm
Had coffee for the first time in a few years.
Why did you stop? Why did you start back up? I find this fascinating. How did you take your coffee?
Stabbed in the eyes with a fucking caak...

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kevin hash
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

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godofdeadlydeath wrote: Mon Apr 26, 2021 1:27 pm
kevin hash wrote: Wed Apr 21, 2021 1:05 pm
Had coffee for the first time in a few years.
Why did you stop? Why did you start back up? I find this fascinating. How did you take your coffee?
I was going overboard on caffeine so I held off. Then I realized a few years went by.

I had coffee because I missed the magic of a good coffee dump.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

Post by kevin hash »

10:43am.

Was sitting qt the new job and then it hit me like a ton of bricks.

The wrenching spasms of a good hot shit.

I raced home and could feel the poop starting to happen. Turd was exiting before buns hit seat. It is a massive shit. Turd felt endless. Now I'm sitting here letting my asshole spasm shut again.

Total gaper. Smells very putrid. Felt like excellence.

Shitting is the best.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

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FYI that shit was taller than the water and took 6 flushes to go down.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

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1:42pm

Didn't feel this one coming on.

Unnngghhhh. Feels hot and club shaped.

Quiet heated poots follow up.

Now for the ungjfhhhfjfh.....final chunk falls with a cute little splash.

Smells very poopy up in here right now.

Waiting for one last bubble gum wad to slide off the ol buttlips.

Life liberty and the pursuit of a good sexy shit.

Oh wait.....here comes.....ugughghhhhh an easy sliding overheated shit global.

Heil.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

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426pm

Sitting in my office....concentration totally shot.

Time to front myself a shit.

UGHFJFJFGGGGGGFFFGHHHHHHH

2 foot broiler slides out. Fuckin riddled with pockets of farts.

Reeks like rotten meat.

Pushing a lil extra bonus gumball out for good measure. Sneaky snake goes dancing.

Stomach tenses up as shit leaves my human form.

My ass is sizzly.

Will shit more when I get home.
Heil.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

Post by kevin hash »

4:54pm

Unngggghhhhhjj.......girthy and lengthy coffee fueled poopoo anaconda slides out with ease.

This one was building to the point where there was no concentrating on my work.

Ripping wet bubbly farts. My bathroom smells like rotten new york steaks.

Here comes more....ughjjhhhhhh. soft serve chunk falls.

More farts.....not sure if there is more dumpage but it certainly feels like it.

Fuckin glorious!
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

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4:59pm

Here we go.

Uhhggghgjgghb. Kinda pokey on the front end but plenty of soft burning hot shit sliding out as I type.

Wet cakey sounding breakage as it glides into the pissy water.

Not a lot of smell....but the farts at the office were egged out like a motherfucker. More poop is coming out now....ugghgjghhhh.

Now the stink is hittin and it is making my dick tingle.

Shitting is a luxury item.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

Post by Zerohero »

Wet fart Himler.
Garbage fart Hanneman.
Post corn blowout Vinnie Vincent.
Shitting through a cookie press with christmas patterns, Billy Sheehan.

Sweet Lord Toto, sweet lord Amercan Standard.
Fiber, the quick pickerupper.
rileyo wrote:i like that she's wearing high heels &stockings to get fucked by dead pigs,that's some real forward thinking metal right there
LordDarksoul wrote:Thanks for the concern, Fucktractor.
BUNGVOX wrote:i don't want metallica to shit their pants. i want metallica to shit MY pants.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

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3:27pm.

Off work a few hours early. Getting the weekend off to a fine start.

Uggghhhhhhhh

Plop. A nice chunk of steaming hot shit falls. Followed up by butt lip sizzling farts.

Unnnjhjggggggb another meaty dinner corpse eases out. Asshole is stinging.

More muffled cakey farts exit. Pockets of farts exist in my ass.

Uugffhvjfjfkgkl b....more poo poo. Need to calm down the stinging is getting nervewracking.

Now I sit allowing some pee to leave my hot hanging dick. Giving some extra time for the endorphins to ease the butt lips as they close shop for a little but.

I would divorce my wife if it meant I could take 5 shits a day.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

Post by Zerohero »

legal question for you paralegals:

if you have a dick in your butthole, then have the urge to crank out a dump...and take a shit dislodging the dick from your butthole in process--- do you get to claim to have "Shit Dick"? Or is that the drum trigger equal to dick shitting? :bigdog:

enquiring minds want to know.
rileyo wrote:i like that she's wearing high heels &stockings to get fucked by dead pigs,that's some real forward thinking metal right there
LordDarksoul wrote:Thanks for the concern, Fucktractor.
BUNGVOX wrote:i don't want metallica to shit their pants. i want metallica to shit MY pants.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

Post by kevin hash »

I'm holding in some poo right now. I'm starting to get those late night shit sweats.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

Post by kevin hash »

Zerohero wrote: Mon Jan 10, 2022 6:21 pm legal question for you paralegals:

if you have a dick in your butthole, then have the urge to crank out a dump...and take a shit dislodging the dick from your butthole in process--- do you get to claim to have "Shit Dick"? Or is that the drum trigger equal to dick shitting? :bigdog:

enquiring minds want to know.
I buttfucked this broad one time and she glazed my prick with poop.

I wouldn't necessarily say that would qualify as "shitdick" which is typically used as an insult.

Now it is probable that by gunking my sperm silo up with her leavings could have been viewed as an insult.

For example: your dick is too small let me go poop on it.

Or

Your dick is too big let me go poop on it.

I did not see it as an insult but rather I saw it as a nice little piece of business.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

Post by kevin hash »

2:25pm

Had to race to find thus thread and I'm holding onto this turd for dear life right now. Total donut butt.

Push.....uhhggggnnn total coffee fueled log exits with a few puffy embedded farts.

Bet the turd is long as fuck. I will check as soon as my shit pipe closes.

Smells like pure shit. Not meaty but kinda foody. Smells hot. Feels hot.

Butt lips are sizzling.

I'll give this one a 6 on the pure luxury factor alone. Wasn't a total soul draining dump but definitely a good one.

Visual inspection. 3 broken clay colored hunks. Sticking up from the water which is the reason why my bathroom smells so awful right now. Good girth. Borderline soft serve.

Sweet lord whipple
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

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9:46 am

Ughghghghh.....bumpy, wet, and laced with cutesy doughy farts.

Stomach is aching like a mutha.

Extra chunk falls with splash.

Here comes a poot.....uggghghhfhh.....slow hot soft serve hits the water like a pick axe.

Smells like diarrhea and meat. It's thick in here.

More hot hunks fall out with zero effort. Ploop sploosh. Feel a few wet balls of doo doo clinging to butt pubes. This is gonna be messy. Double wipe special.

Waiting for a few pieces of piss to leave peen station so my asshole can close up shop.

The smell of a good salty piss overtakes to poop whiffs but only temporarily.

Taking shits is my national past time. Smell it boys!
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

Post by kevin hash »

9:54 am

Couldn't concentrate.....so here goes.

A soft Whispery fart leaves my asshole as I sit down on the pot. It was cold but stinks like eggs and sweat.

Ugfhhhhhh crowning.

Fat bulbous log creeps out of my fart cauldron. Instant smell. The butt lips sting but in that over stretched kinda way and not because I ate some ghost peppers.

Maybe more? Nah. Could just be a little bit of fartage.

Nothing.

The scent of burnt meat is tickling my nostrils. I smell notes of butt sweat and coffee.

Heil.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

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:invcross: Fart Cauldron :invcross:
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

Post by MPD »

GREAT SIZZLIN' BUTT LIPS!

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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

Post by kevin hash »

I really need a good hot shit.

Maybe this hot Ramen will stir up the demons.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

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9:06 am

Concentration broke. Butthole is full. Time to bump out a hot one.

Ughghghghhhhhb......easy push. Log feels thick and meaty.

Fat chunk drops with big splash. Fumes are hittin. Smells like a public toilet at the beach in here. Kinda pissy and kinda poopy with notes of saltwater and seagull sounds.

Asshole is sizzling right now. Finally snapped shut. I think there might be a another chunk yet to come. Gotta get this piece of piss out first. Nope. Poopoo takes the lead.

Uggghghhjh.....loud fart precedes a glacial turd. Exiting ever so slowly.

Plop.

Plip.

Push. Moist smacky sounds emit.

Cute little drip plops out. Bowels are rumbling. Big loud poot pops out. Smells like a septic tank and rotten chicken. Growls fart pushes another nugget out.

Fart. Chunk.

Fart. Chunk.

Now I'm pushing out a little soft serve. Endless glory.

Heil.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

Post by kevin hash »

3:39 pm

A double shit day. Praise Sweet Lord Hitler

Unnngfjgjfjfjfhfhvghh. Hard push.

Soft serve issues forth....pock marked with popping farts.

Hot sticky smacking noises cut through like a gentle melody.

Think there's a chunk hanging off the butt lips. Fuckin stinks like hot meat. In here.

I'm sauteeing in the fumes of glory.

Shitting is my heroin.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

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9:30 am

Not a concentration breaker but I'm gonna sit down and try for a little poopoo.

Thick airy fart busts loose. Dinner Ghosts abound to dance in my nostrils.

Poot. Meaty and underweary.

Pip. Quick snap of poopoo fumes.

Push......ughgjgjghgjv......fuck.

Push again......ghdjffhfffhfhhhh....its easing out rather slowly. Stinks so good.

John Pooper Mellencrap.

Thick girthy hunk plops out followed up by a Hershey kiss sized plooper.

Smells glorious. Feels unsatisfactory. Need a gut emptying dysentery special.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

Post by Zerohero »

'Thar She Blows!!!" Gabriel Warrior toot that hornie horn.... PHHHHHFFFTLLLLUUUUUUTTTTT!!!!!!!

Incredible Hulk n'ver dumper harder faster, green darkie turd soldliers, marching onward, southward, transcendental passage to the underworld, orpheus of high fiber floaters, sink sank sunk, to the depths of the modern sewage poop orgy, swimming in union with ass fuck fecal cum, dirty tampons, burrito kamikazi zoomers, and last but not least, bowser's dump on the new carpet, flushed down commode.

What fantasy.

Truth?

Reading Iron Maiden book, on a toi___t. Time to get off the pot.
rileyo wrote:i like that she's wearing high heels &stockings to get fucked by dead pigs,that's some real forward thinking metal right there
LordDarksoul wrote:Thanks for the concern, Fucktractor.
BUNGVOX wrote:i don't want metallica to shit their pants. i want metallica to shit MY pants.
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Re: TIME TO TAKE A SHIT.

Post by kevin hash »

12:35pm

It's easter.....time to lay some eggs.

Ughgvgfhhhhhh........little push......turd is distorting my asshole as it slides out. Thick. Meaty. Stink factor is low right now.

Some pee comes out to seal the deal.

I think that's all for now. Not much to write home about ma.
I am just glad I got to drop a little poopoo.

BrrrrraAAAAAAp. Nice slappy fart bursts forth onto the scene.

More pee dribblins.

Shitting is the best.
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