The Bill's Now Playing Video Game Thread (Now with Bames)

[FVBTVS]

no. theres not a fucking ounce of bit in what i said, especially not in whatever you took as video games journalism speak . lord even knows what that means. i was yes anding him. my bits are good

if anything

IF ANYTHING it was pseudo game design speak if that. which is a thing that exists

am i still posting in english

[The Bill]

No one ‘Yes Andings’ me and gets away with it!

For that I won’t play some game and I’ll play another, that’ll learn you.

Honestly, I’ve had the worst fucking cold or something in forever, and I can’t even bother to play anything. My world problems.

[spacehamster]

What about ludo-narrative dissonance, though, guys? YOU GUYS.

[The Bill]

What about ludo-narrative dissonance, though, guys? YOU GUYS.

That’s never been an issue because that’s just storytelling shit, but I do fully embrace Nude-Narrative anytime.

[FVBTVS]

What about ludo-narrative dissonance, though, guys? YOU GUYS.

I posted a sincere response to his DOOM VS BORDERLANDS comparison and youre over here on the next page still sucking my fat cock over it. )I( literally don't know what the fuxk ludo narrative even is and never will

What are you so fucking insecure about???

[FVBTVS]

DOOM = SOLID FANATICAL EMPHASIS ON GAMEPLAY
BORDERLANDS = GOOD GAMEPLAY LOOP BUT MENUS AND GREEN TRIANGLES AND RED TRIANGLES, LOOT PILE AND NUMBERS AND "BUILDS" THAT TAKE MORE AND MORE TIME AWAY FROM GAMEPLAY

[FVBTVS]

Why is DOOM infinitely better than Borderlands? I’m not sure what the formula is, but I’m seeing this is a huge problem for me. Most new games feel like games, so I’m more than willing to replay older shit I’ve played before because they are an experience not a task or chore. I don’t know, am I making sense?

[The Bill]

literally don't know what the fuxk ludo narrative even is and never will

It’s stupid pompous shit about how game play can ruin story telling immersion. It was first mentioned in some nerd’s thesis about Bioshock, I think. Yes, some one took Bioshock seriously enough to write a grand theory about. Bioshock, where eating potatoe chips out of a garbage can heals bullet wounds.

[spacehamster]

I don't understand what's happening here anymore, but I'm sorry if I caused it.

[The Bill]

I don't understand what's happening here anymore, but I'm sorry if I caused it.

It’s your fault! Now I’m replaying Batman Arkham Asylum with all these fancy dancy 4K textures and 4K movies, and fancy lighting and colors and except for minor characters’ faces it fucking gorgeous.

Also DOOM 3, with this mod is gorgeous.

Everything is gorgeous!! Everything except what you did, Spacehsmster!

[spacehamster]

weept

In other news, I still haven't finished Baldur's Gate 3. I'd say I'm going to do that, but then I'll remember I still need to max out the Assault class in Space Marine 2 even though I don't even particularly like playing it.

[The Bill]

weept

In other news, I still haven't finished Baldur's Gate 3. I'd say I'm going to do that, but then I'll remember I still need to max out the Assault class in Space Marine 2 even though I don't even particularly like playing it.

See now! You’re doing it again.

I see Space Marine 2 is constantly being patched, and I hear that the patches are fucking around with the actual game (not just bug fixes), like making shit harder.

And I keep seeing patches for that Baldur’s Gate. And those patches are like a thousand things each time. Christ on a cracker!

I might dive back into that Guardian’s of the Galaxy Game, and I might tweak something to make it not so bullet sponges, I liked it but got bored of the combat. If I can just speed it all up, you know.

[spacehamster]

I see Space Marine 2 is constantly being patched, and I hear that the patches are fucking around with the actual game (not just bug fixes), like making shit harder.

That's really only happened once in a way that mattered. People were complaining about the 3.0 patch making the game too easy (which it really hadn't), so they released 4.0, which was basically game-breaking and needed to be rolled back a week later. I don't think they're going to fuck with the difficulty much from here on out. It was annoying, though. It's never good when devs start taking orders from the Reddit ComplainSquad.

And I keep seeing patches for that Baldur’s Gate. And those patches are like a thousand things each time. Christ on a cracker!

That's what I meant to look into - when the game came out, the third chapter was apparently kinda broken, but I never made it that far before I got distracted. So now I've basically decided I might as well wait until they've fixed whatever needed fixin'. Up to where I played (somewhere into the 2nd chapter), everything was fine.

[The Bill]

I might dive back into that Guardian’s of the Galaxy Game, and I might tweak something to make it not so bullet sponges, I liked it but got bored of the combat. If I can just speed it all up, you know.

Yeah, that was a dumb idea. Back to Bats!

[The Bill]

I pondered getting a subscription to GeForce Now for a month or so, for my birthday, just to play a few games my PC has issues with and to see this Ray Tracing. But apparently you need to actually own the game in order to stream it

Very slowly getting through Bats and Doom 3. I also added into my play mix, a version of Tomb Raider (2013) which was a “definitive version “ for PS5. Apparently, it’s only available for PC via the dreadful Microsoft store. I ‘obtained it’ and it’s fucking beautiful. So, I’m playing as Lara Croft for the tenth time in 2024. The more I play as the so called ‘Survivor’ version of her the more I absolutely love her. Her character is like Sherlock Holmes meets MacGyver meets Hannibal Lecter.

[The Bill]

Beat Bats again.

Beat Tomb Raider Def Edition (2013) again.

Beat Rise of the Tomb Raider (Big tits mod) again.

Stopped Doom 3 in favor of replay Half-Life 2 (Anniversary Update) so fucking good, have a bunch of workshop mods, game is great.

Started Lost in Random. Love the Psychonaghts meets Gaimen art and universe. We’ll see how it goes from here but I might have problems. Two preteen sisters dialogue:

“I’m coming, sis.”
“Please, sis. I need you.”
“I’m coming, sis. Don’t move!”

[The Bill]

Overly Modded Half-Life 2 might be game of the year. It’s utter madness, a look into my brain. I never thought I’d be the asshole putting Beavis sounds and big titty women, and cartoon enemies and so much blood and bodies and Doom soundtrack and …. into a serious game. Barney as Kanye West? Fuck, yes!

Hl2 still gets the title for great game despite a lot of annoying parts. The good well out weighs the bad but if I can never have to do some of this shit again then I’d be content, but I will play it again one day.

[The Bill]

Beat HL2 and now working on HL2 Episode 1. Only second time ever playing it. Alyx talks a lot, huh? It’s very well polished, but too gimmick heavy. Almost every section has to have a ‘game mechanic’ attached to it.

[The Bill]

Witcher 4, you play as Ciri instead of Gerald. That’s like if Last Crusade starred Short Round instead of Indy. Fuck off!

Speaking of, can’t play new Indy on PC because my nVidia card is a GTX, not an RTX. Fuck off!!

No wonder I’m going to play remasters of Tomb Raider, Soul Reaver, and The Thing. New games suck.

Beat HL2 Ep1. Now playing episode 2, which I never finished. I cannot think of any other first person shooter that I should have played already, but haven’t that would qualify as bucket list. Sure, there are CODs and 3DO games being remastered and Morrowind, but this is truly it, I think, and I bid you all a fine farewell if I drop dead after I beat it.

Oh, wait, no. XIII would also be on a list like that.

[THE KILL]

3DO games being remastered

lol wut. why

[The Bill]

3DO games being remastered

lol wut. why

[The Bill]

I’m a grown ass man. No way I’m playing this shit, right? No way I’m going to play as the Pink Ranger…

[THE KILL]

woah!

[The Bill]

Tomb Raider 1-2-3 Remaster
Chasm: The Rift Remaster
Soul Reaver 1 & 2 Remaster

3 (actually 6) old games I always wanted to try but never got to that had zero audio when I tried them, I’d Tomb and Chasm refunded on Steam on GOG multiple times. But great news everybody! I found a thing that did something unholy to my PC and now it audio works so I stole all three titles and I’m happy.

Been getting through Tomb Raider 1. I like this so much better than Tomb Raider Anniversary.

[The Bill]

I had a lot of free time during the Holidays and spent most of my time with Lara Croft.

Tomb Raider 1 - Love this Tomb Raider 1 remaster. What a great adventure and great use of map space. I had almost no issue with the modern controls once I knew what I was doing. I did use the Nexus to add improved textures, lighting, and models. There are archaic PS1 era issues abound, like combat and some platforming, but nothing generous quick saves can’t redeem. Seriously, ended up with about a thousand saves I liked this so much I had to give Tomb Raider: Anniversary a retry.

Tomb Raider: Anniversary - Garbage! Hated how they changed levels into streamlined parkour and cliffhanger bad gameplay. Hated how despite major graphical overhaul it looks less grandiose. Hate the change from polite yet psycho Croft to female Mary-Sue chick James Bond Croft. This is probably the fault of those dreadful Angelina films. Boss fights are now lame quick time shit or this poorly realized slow motion thing. Her huge tits are nice, good to see they hadn’t reduced them, yet. I needed a walkthrough a lot more for this than the PS1 version. The hell?

Tomb Raider: Underworld - I wanted to finish the trilogy while it was fresh in my mind. Didn’t finish it. Just skimmed through it by watching cutscenes on YouTube. It’s the same horse shit from Anniversary mixed with Legends terrible comic book story. I just really don’t like this Lara despite dressing like a dirty whore. Her ensemble cast also fucking blows. More bad platform gymnastics that is even more convoluted. I can’t even fathom how anyone has the patience to play this without quick saving. Fuck, I can’t get over how bad the story is and if I’m going to watch something with this many ‘edgy’ female main characters I best see some carpet munching.

Tomb Raider 2 Remaster - More of the same as Tomb Raider 1 but on a grander scale, sort of. It’s very much like a sequel to a Madden game or the like. Some new features and new graphics (I guess, this is remastered) and probably done by a different team but essentially same old shit. It’s not as good as 1. Too many human enemies, way too much back tracking and finding not so obvious switches and doors. There’s been cool set pieces like an upside down sunken ship, but nothing is as epic as some of the Tomb Raider 1 levels. There was a shark incident that aged me, though. Fucking ocean. Still playing it, and I’ve needed the walkthrough much more, but I like it. I know a snow mobile part is coming in a few levels, please let it not be bullshit and ruin the game!


Misc:

Beat Return to Castle Wolfenstein via the RealRTCW mod which is now a must and I can’t ever replay it without this mod (9/10. Fire zombie can still fuck off)

Started XIII Classic (with tweaks to make it super pretty) this is not my first attempt, lets hope whatever my past issues with it aren’t still an issue.