The Wolf of Relapse

[hipster holocaust]

My unemployment ran out and literally the only two jobs I could find were for slimy merchant cash advance private equity firms in the fucking Trump building on Wall Street. I fucking hate it and make less than minimum wage until I close a deal but get a kick out of all the bright eyed finance bros that beat off to the thought of having a job here. The building’s cafeteria in the basement is once the world’s largest bank vault converted into ten different lavish rooms including one with a pool table.

The first day my boss told me that I need more big dick energy while on the phone.

I can’t stress how much I fucking hate it and how terrible the people are here. As soon as I find literally anything else I’m done. Ask questions only douche bags would know.

[cxwx]

[FVBTVS]

[cxwx]

[Geeheeb]

that sucks!

[postaddiction]

What's the most noticeable cliche you see a lot of among these people?

[hipster holocaust]

I feel like I’m the only one there without a vest. Also who doesn’t shave, wears flannel, and has constant fml face.

The kitchen station and bathrooms are absolutely filthy. Like coffee stains everywhere, toilet paper all the fuck over the flooe and piss and shit marks. Pretty amazing when remembering half these retards are pulling in over 7 figures a year.

[FVBTVS]

seven figures do they need a fvbts

im a fucking retard

[hipster holocaust]

Damn bruh you makin the Monopoly money too?

[Introvert]

I feel like I’m the only one there without a vest. Also who doesn’t shave, wears flannel, and has constant fml face.

The kitchen station and bathrooms are absolutely filthy. Like coffee stains everywhere, toilet paper all the fuck over the flooe and piss and shit marks. Pretty amazing when remembering half these retards are pulling in over 7 figures a year.

Love you little brother! Any chance you could move the family to the less shitty side of the country?

[ThePhillyExperiment]

[Necrometer]

this makes me fucking sick to think about

get OUTTA there

[hipster holocaust]

I feel like I’m the only one there without a vest. Also who doesn’t shave, wears flannel, and has constant fml face.

The kitchen station and bathrooms are absolutely filthy. Like coffee stains everywhere, toilet paper all the fuck over the flooe and piss and shit marks. Pretty amazing when remembering half these retards are pulling in over 7 figures a year.

Love you little brother! Any chance you could move the family to the less shitty side of the country?

Dude I fantasize every day about leaving this shithole. I was at a bar a few days ago bonding over some kid from Seattle bitching about how he left since he disliked his hometown. I didn’t understand how people could leave a sanitized version of Philly and he confirmed that was an accurate description of Seattle

[cxwx]

I can’t stress how much I fucking hate it and how terrible the people are here...Ask questions only douche bags would know.

How insecure are your coworkers? How close to another CDO based financial collapse are we? Do you think any of the people you work with are actually Patrick Bateman?

[THE KILL]

this makes me fucking sick to think about

get OUTTA there

[hipster holocaust]

If Batman’s dad is a real person he sits next to me and pitched to some poor gullible motherfucker they need a hundred grand in their bank account tomorrow at 40% interest

[cxwx]

[Hunter]

This is your chance to climb through the office ranks posing as one of them - then take down the whole operation from the top down. The sleeper will awaken!

[hipster holocaust]

Too much work. If I’m here next week it will be a fuckin Xmas miracle

[cxwx]

[postaddiction]

Get one of them to post here. Target guys named Chad. We need a replacement Chad.

[Geeheeb]

Wall Street Chad is gonna be even more racist though

[hipster holocaust]

lol funny you mentioned that. I told the guy next to me I’m gonna be in Philly next week and he asked if I was gonna go to Geno’s cheesesteaks. I said I go to Pat’s across the street instead since they don’t have any boneheaded racist signs saying press 1 for English and 2 for deportation. He replied with if you can’t order in English you shouldn’t get your food. FUCK THIS FUCKING PLACE

[cxwx]

lol funny you mentioned that. I told the guy next to me I’m gonna be in Philly next week and he asked if I was gonna go to Geno’s cheesesteaks. I said I go to Pat’s across the street instead since they don’t have any boneheaded racist signs saying press 1 for English and 2 for deportation. He replied with if you can’t order in English you shouldn’t get your food. FUCK THIS FUCKING PLACE

As them what country Spain is in

[Toilet Fleet]

Wait are you seriously in merchant cash advance

Because seriously with cost of capital and liquidity issues, cannabis in CA...