Auguries Forecasting an Inexorable Decrepitude [NOW A SLEEP POLL]

Music posts are a bannable offense.

how do you sleep

on my back
1
9%
on my side
8
73%
head hits concrete vocalist
1
9%
sometimes, on my fucking face like a maniac
1
9%
😑
0
No votes
 
Total votes: 11
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soiled depends
I'm always posting. At all times.
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Wed May 16, 2012 9:47 pm

The Torsion wrote:ITT: Dudes under 50 will whine about being "old" because they aren't teenagers anymore.

are they over 17? then, yeah.....they might....
does your employer know that you are a cold hearted animal murderer in addition to being an insatiable pervert?-meatgrease
only a fundamentally insecure asshole would relish in the death of domesticated cats-chad

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Cascade Whore
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Thu May 17, 2012 12:03 am

recurring lower back injury flares up every few years from being a fucking moron and trying to carry a 70 pound safe on my shoulder and then stepping downwards while twisting my spine. I was told by a sports medicine guy my knee's will probably be fucked from walking up and down 17 foot tall ladders with 50 pound boxes of paper on my shoulder for about a decade. Not to mention being a monumental fat fuck to begin with. At least I have larger than average calf muscles.
Wank night's cancelled

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Cascade Whore
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Thu May 17, 2012 12:12 am

Oh yeah, I managed to develop adult eczema but apparently I'm "lucky" because it only flares up once every few years. This probably doesn't really fit the spirit of decrepitude though.
Wank night's cancelled

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fallbacktostone
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Thu May 17, 2012 12:16 am

close bro of mine back in 2000-2001 had this tom savini-esque eczema breakout that was one of the most intense things i'd ever seen. he went from wise cracking go lucky little rascal bro to a completely secluded and enshrouded elephant man in like 4-5 hours. it was amazing. once it was over i think he lived his life in a totally different way

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Cascade Whore
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Thu May 17, 2012 12:41 am

fallbacktostone wrote:close bro of mine back in 2000-2001 had this tom savini-esque eczema breakout that was one of the most intense things i'd ever seen. he went from wise cracking go lucky little rascal bro to a completely secluded and enshrouded elephant man in like 4-5 hours. it was amazing. once it was over i think he lived his life in a totally different way

yeah, I was actually relieved I wasn't a filthy enough fucking slob to have ringworm .......this is about what my elbow pits will look like Image.........this is actually pretty mild. Pic's of severe cases are fucking ridiculous.
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fallbacktostone
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Thu May 17, 2012 12:47 am

yeah i'd had different traumatic things happen to my body before and seen different shit in my life up to that point but that was the first time where like, when it was over and he returned to 'normal' i felt like i'd seen something holy and that it was impossible that he was not completely scarred forever.

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Cascade Whore
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Thu May 17, 2012 1:40 am

Cryptoplasty wrote:Calf cramps are the worst pain imaginable
What's your basis for comparison princess?
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gustavprom
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Thu May 17, 2012 2:14 am

cartlidge in my right knee is fucked and starts giving me pain when i walk more than a kilometer. But I have had this problem since I was 17. The difference now is that it hurts sooner and deeper...

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Cascade Whore
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Thu May 17, 2012 2:20 am

gustavprom wrote:cartlidge in my right knee is fucked and starts giving me pain when i walk more than a kilometer. But I have had this problem since I was 17. The difference now is that it hurts sooner and deeper...
Stop whining like a fucking cunt. There's a man in here that's gone through a wicked charlie horse
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father of lies
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Thu May 17, 2012 2:25 am

Aside from a lot of back stiffness from when I hurt it at work a few years go, I feel pretty spectacular. You guys suck...
fvkk

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Cascade Whore
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Thu May 17, 2012 2:34 am

father of lies wrote:Aside from a lot of back stiffness from when I hurt it at work a few years go, I feel pretty spectacular. You guys suck...
All those years of lugging around that proton pack must have kept you in shape. Blow me you fucking brain dead asshole.
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father of lies
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Thu May 17, 2012 2:37 am

Hauling an unlicensed nuclear accelerator is a good workout.
fvkk

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Necrometer
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Thu May 17, 2012 8:47 am

The Torsion wrote:ITT: Dudes under 50 will whine about being "old" because they aren't teenagers anymore.
that was precisely the point of the thread, but please continue to pat yourself on the back for your top-tier sleuthing
father of lies wrote:Hauling an unlicensed nuclear accelerator is a good workout.
are there even licenses available for such things? I'm about to go have an unlicensed protein/berry shake...
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good thing I'll be dead soon, cause I'm tired of liars winning

Zerohero
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Thu May 17, 2012 8:55 am

Think I might stop by and grab a slice of Salmonella "Sal's" pizza at Via Veneto at lunch...and not use my walker to make it in the door.

:pizza:
rileyo wrote:i like that she's wearing high heels &stockings to get fucked by dead pigs,that's some real forward thinking metal right there
LordDarksoul wrote:Thanks for the concern, Fucktractor.
BUNGVOX wrote:i don't want metallica to shit their pants. i want metallica to shit MY pants.

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Mooretician
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Thu May 17, 2012 9:17 am

Over the last year or so I lost 60 pounds and am now in the best shape of my life. I work out 3-5 days a week and eat like a tinfoil hat health-nut dickhead. I will be 30 in August. Despite all that shit I notice a ton of aches and pains that weren't there before. The "being careful having sex" line resonates with me quite a bit...I had a weird taint cramp a few weeks ago that lingered for days and freaked me right the fuck out. My knees and ankles hurt from a decade of playing football and my lower back occasionally gets sore but for the most part, I feel pretty good.
copstache wrote:on a positive note, i hope if i get old and encrippled my nurses come and put on Judeobeast Assassin and watch my horrible atrophied limbs twitch in some mess of neurons flickering and dying

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Introvert
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Thu May 17, 2012 9:37 am

Mooretician wrote:taint cramp
:confused: :confused:

wut?????
Friendly Goatus wrote:and stop being a dick to your cat

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badgevvrecker
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Thu May 17, 2012 12:08 pm

gouty arthritis in right ankle, blown out left knee, sciatica, asthma, cardiac arrhythmia, and my eyes just aren't what they used to be.

oh well, that's par for 34, right?

taint cramps are the worst. jesus fuck do i hate that shit.

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Mooretician
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Thu May 17, 2012 1:30 pm

Introvert wrote:
Mooretician wrote:taint cramp
:confused: :confused:

wut?????
Yeah man, :confused: indeed. It's like, you're dick's all hard already but the strain of it wanting to be even harder causes the taint to sort of cinch up. Imagine clenching your butt cheeks together so hard that it causes a cramp beyond your asshole. It sucks. I don't know if it's an old dude thing but it sure as shit didn't happen to me when I was a 22 year old fuck machine.
copstache wrote:on a positive note, i hope if i get old and encrippled my nurses come and put on Judeobeast Assassin and watch my horrible atrophied limbs twitch in some mess of neurons flickering and dying

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Necrometer
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Thu May 17, 2012 1:34 pm

Ah yes, reminds me of fucking with a 'roid. Nuts to that.
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postaddiction
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Thu May 17, 2012 2:39 pm

My luck has run out
SPOILERSPOILER_SHOW
Edit: And most of the people I meet are younger and more well adjusted and/or successful.

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:warrior:

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Hossana
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Thu May 17, 2012 3:06 pm

Back pain, and mild hemroids. My GF likes touching my 'roids tho. Says it reminds her of her clit.
Hell is, ...other people.

Zerohero
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Thu May 17, 2012 3:53 pm

Hossana wrote:Back pain, and mild hemroids. My GF likes touching my 'roids tho. Says it reminds her of her clit.
:idea:
maybe those babies explain your Jaws Turds
rileyo wrote:i like that she's wearing high heels &stockings to get fucked by dead pigs,that's some real forward thinking metal right there
LordDarksoul wrote:Thanks for the concern, Fucktractor.
BUNGVOX wrote:i don't want metallica to shit their pants. i want metallica to shit MY pants.

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Necrometer
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Fri Nov 18, 2016 2:56 pm

my body is increasingly like an old cell phone - my battery holds less and less total charge (faster to reach full charge, too, actually - seldom sleep past 8, assuming no alarm)

basically every day I want need a nap by mid-afternoon

I've never been a coffee drinker but I literally don't think I can continue to impersonate a gainfully employed person with this sleepy burden killing half my days

there are sofas everywhere at my workplace but I don't want to look like a slob being asleep in front of everyone - I actually have an office but I am cursed with TRANSPARENT walls so I can't even really plop a couch in there.

does anyone have a standing desk? I have office chairs that are not KILLING ME but they force me to maintain good posture, which is pretty physically taxing in a subtle way that adds up when it's non-stop
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good thing I'll be dead soon, cause I'm tired of liars winning

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Geeheeb
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Fri Nov 18, 2016 3:13 pm

I had standing desk (and two windows) when I was still IT working and I have a standing desk with a barstool at home.

Also as far as decrepitude, I broke my clavicle a few years ago and it healed shortened by about 1.5 cm and I have never been the same. I get awful muscle spasms that trigger migraines. I already had really bad back pain but now I'm like a different person.
FVBTVS wrote:
Tue Feb 06, 2018 12:04 pm
from enslavement to obliteration is older than abbey road

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Necrometer
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Fri Nov 18, 2016 3:21 pm

you're saying this latest shit makes your back issues seem less severe? jesus christ :lhug:

anyway, how did the standesk change your life? is it more tiring than being a pile of slug-flesh, or less?
Geeheeb wrote:two windows
SPOILERSPOILER_SHOW
:gold:
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