Generic Business Oriented Website

Bump for this e-mail convo:

Me:

Try this:

Go to: http://www.hotdudesintightpants.com/previews/thenumberoftheorder.pdf

Example: http://www.hotdudesintightpants.com/previews/611.pdf

That should take you directly to the pdf you made

Reply:

The top link didn’t work but the bottom one did.

Two girls I work with talking about the Twilight series:

"So wait... does she turn into a vampire too?!"

"Wait... in the book or in real life?"


I facepalmed so hard.

" mr battletweeter, stop posting on that website, and get to work"

totally dumb comment from my boss.

ThE GodDamN BattletweeteR wrote:" mr battletweeter, stop posting on that website, and get to work"

totally dumb comment from my boss.

If you don't get back to work, you will get fired and will not be able to provide for Mia or take her mom out on hot dates.

MANTIS wrote:Seen Skycrawlers yet? It's out but I'm broke. Ack.

Nope. The way things look right now it's gonna take me another decade to watch it. Any news from the Tachigui front?

THE KILL wrote:

MANTIS wrote:

BoraBora wrote:Video store.

One woman:

"I don't wanna watch this one. It's not in English. It's got words on the bottom and you gotta read 'em."

Other woman:

"Well, it's better than reading a book."

Yeah that made my head hurt as well. I actually refuse to believe that there's scum on this planet that fucking retarded.

Denial is rarely healthy.

R A Burpcore wrote:

THE KILL wrote:

MANTIS wrote:

BoraBora wrote:Video store.

One woman:

"I don't wanna watch this one. It's not in English. It's got words on the bottom and you gotta read 'em."

Other woman:

"Well, it's better than reading a book."

Yeah that made my head hurt as well. I actually refuse to believe that there's scum on this planet that fucking retarded.

Denial is rarely healthy.

Posted this gem a while back from a former job after mentioning how much better the book version of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy was compared to the moive:

jakebonz wrote:"I don't read books because they'll ruin the movie for me"

Same dude would also point out Internet Memes that belong in that Ragman's Hot Now Internet thread.

jakebonz wrote:

R A Burpcore wrote:

THE KILL wrote:

MANTIS wrote:

BoraBora wrote:Video store.

One woman:

"I don't wanna watch this one. It's not in English. It's got words on the bottom and you gotta read 'em."

Other woman:

"Well, it's better than reading a book."

Yeah that made my head hurt as well. I actually refuse to believe that there's scum on this planet that fucking retarded.

Denial is rarely healthy.

Posted this gem a while back from a former job after mentioning how much better the book version of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy was compared to the moive:

jakebonz wrote:"I don't read books because they'll ruin the movie for me"

Same dude would also point out Internet Memes that belong in that Ragman's Hot Now Internet thread.

Ugh... This is the kind of mindset that makes me secretly wish for an apocalyptic, population reducing disaster to happen like right the fuck now.

Even better, force people to do book reports for food

jakebonz wrote:Even better, force people to do book reports for food

This never would have crossed my mind in a million years but yes, that is something I would very much enjoy seeing.

"Hey man, that concrete truck can't be here more than 90 minutes"

"Are you fucking kidding me? You're going to apply ACI standards to concrete for a fucking Bentonite slurry?"

"I'm just saying man, technically, it's no good after 90 minutes."

"It's 'technically' no good if you're pouring a goddamn pier cap for a bridge. This isn't structural work!"

"The ACI standards state man...very clearly that..."

"ACI standards don't fucking apply when you're mixing concrete with Bentonite to fill casing holes just to get decent compaction."

"But..."

"Show me in the specs where it applies ACI standards to backfill."

"I'm going to go to your prime about this."

"Go ahead, they don't care. Robert's going to pour it whether you like it or not. We'll go straight to your resident engineer if you want. We'll call him on a Sunday and everything."

The Torsion wrote:"I'm going to go to your prime about this."

One of the best ones I hear was the bf telling me a story about a guy calling the pharmacy... and asking what the number for the pharmacy was.

The Torsion wrote:"Hey man, that concrete truck can't be here more than 90 minutes"

"Are you fucking kidding me? You're going to apply ACI standards to concrete for a fucking Bentonite slurry?"

"I'm just saying man, technically, it's no good after 90 minutes."

"It's 'technically' no good if you're pouring a goddamn pier cap for a bridge. This isn't structural work!"

"The ACI standards state man...very clearly that..."

"ACI standards don't fucking apply when you're mixing concrete with Bentonite to fill casing holes just to get decent compaction."

"But..."

"Show me in the specs where it applies ACI standards to backfill."

"I'm going to go to your prime about this."

"Go ahead, they don't care. Robert's going to pour it whether you like it or not. We'll go straight to your resident engineer if you want. We'll call him on a Sunday and everything."

jakebonz wrote:Even better, force people to do book reports for food

++

In reference to the Penguins wearing Stanley Cup Champions hats on the ice:

Yah knowe, you gotta figure they print up hats and shirts for both teams beforehand...

I work in a store that presses custom t-shirts as one of our main features. It's pretty simple work, not screen-printing or complex graphic design or anything like that. We put examples of our work in the window so fawning customers (middle-aged yuppies with screaming children and plump negresses with a litter of 18) can look at them and go AWW CUTE as they walk by. One day two little neeg children, one about the age of seven come in and ask my assistant manager:

"How much it cost y'all put the babyhead on a shirt?"

He wanted to throttle the little shit but that'd be bad for business.

"No, because 100 times a thousand is a million.."
This came from a 50+ year old woman.

He who does not read should not eat.

Over heard about two minutes ago, one customer talking to another. While holding a cd in his hand the guys says to his friend,
"This here is a completation disc, it has a bunch of different bands on one disc."

Uh...

TheDrunkTankJudge wrote:completation

This is not a typo?

jakebonz wrote:

TheDrunkTankJudge wrote:completation

This is not a typo?

I only said "Inquisitation" cuz I couldn't think of that other word, what means "wrassle a bar."

So, the same guy who is about 3 weeks late on every major news story was just over in my area trying to get my co-worker (a big Red Wings fan) to go in with him on an order for some "Game Worn" Stanley Cup finals jerseys. He's doing this because with every order of $200+, you get free shipping. Here is the site:

http://borntrade.com/

Seems totally legit...

I mean, they have on every page...

And it seems completely reasonable that all of the Penguins and Red Wings stuff got sent to China right after the games...

And $36.88 is a good price for one of these...

I used to work with a totally retarded Evangelical dude, named Josh. He was the full embodiment of the stereotype, really. He was a nice enough dude, but he would inevitably ask me a question that would start a conversation in which I wanted to kill him and then myself. Normally, I can discuss whatever the topic of the moment happens to be with morons, and then just ignore when they say things that make my blood boil, but there was just something about the way he would try to prove things that made me go through the roof. He was a good sport, and we were both pretty free to insult each other, and generally enjoy ourselves, but jiminy crickets! Choice selections:

On evolution:
Polar bears and grizzly bears ARE the same. Bears are bears.
Evolution would violate that law that says things get more disordered.
Of course we're better! We made all this! (gesturing wildly at the dirty furniture warehouse)

On human ancestor fossils:
Just because you find a skull that looks different doesn't mean it was a different kind of thing. They just looked different. (LUCY WASN'T ANOTHER SPECIES. SHE WAS JUST FUNNY LOOKING?!)

Terrorism talk! On the troubles in Ireland:
That's been over for like fifty years!
Five minutes later, now talking about the Tokyo subway gas attack: He probably WAS Muslim. (This resulted in a crowd forming as I shouted that he was a racist. This was totally fine. Calling in for a respiratory infection or asthma problems? Suspension!)

On art:
There is no reason for nudity in a movie or a painting or anything, except for some creeps to get their jollies.

Somebody there said that Matthew Shepherd was judged by God and probably went to hell or not. I almost slugged the person that said that, but now I can't remember if it was him, or the kid we called Pastor Matt.

Had the board up while at work the other day, and this one women walked into the studio, only to be promptly greeted by Kevin Kitchel's extended middle finger.

She seemed slightly taken back at first, only to inquire what the hell was that on his wrist. Her first guess, from half a room away, was a bracelet, but upon somewhat closer inspection decided that this was actually a tattoo...of a bracelet.

This is the same women who was telling everyone last year about her daughter's big school bus trip to England. I knew the Brits at the Chunnel, but man...that was quite a surprise to hear that.

R A Burpcore wrote:

jakebonz wrote:Even better, force people to do book reports for food

This never would have crossed my mind in a million years but yes, that is something I would very much enjoy seeing.

i will now begin worshipping jakebonz as a god on earth.